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What can I do with my 14 year old who blames everyone?

Grant it she did have a hard year in school being bullied, failed and is now is summer school. She is in therapy, and everything.

I am just so tired of feeling like I am walking on egg shells with her, she screams at everyone, her sister, my self and everyone around her but sometimes she is a sweet heart. Then again today she was in trouble because she didn't do her summer school homework. She blamed me, her Aunt, and everyone else. Yet she had 11 hours yesterday to do it. I completely forgot, and can't take her anymore. What can I do, besides whipping her ass. The only thing she likes doing is watching tv, how can a punish her????

Answer Question
 
KFree907

Asked by KFree907 at 1:03 PM on Jul. 15, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Level 20 (8,947 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • tell her she has to take responsibility for her actions. Take theTV away.
    Perhaps make her use the time learning to type, reading a classic, making a new meal.
    Maybe she'll develop some other interests.
    would be nice if she'd take them up on her own, but she's 14- life's hard when you're a teen. I wouldn't go back to that age for anything!
    ItsMe89

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 1:06 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • I get the whole blaming everyone thing from my 10 year old occasionally. So, then I start reminding him of EVERYTHING. Like, get his bath, brush his teeth, if I see him putting on shoes I will say, "Dont forget to tie your shoes."
    When he finally gets tired of it and asks why I am reminding him of everything. I tell him, well since you made it clear that every thing you have to do is my responsibility and refuse to take any responsibility yourself, I have to do my job and REMIND you of what you need to do, until I see it is done. When you are ready to take some responsibility let me know, and I will quit reminding you.
    mommy11260

    Answer by mommy11260 at 1:07 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • Sounds like you might profit from reading AGE OF OPPORTUNITY by Paul Tripp. It's a guide for parenting teens.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 1:09 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • if tv is your only currency, then you have to usse it
    as to what you can do, she sounds like the definition of a 14 yr old
    try to find the humor in her "everyone is against me"-not in her face, but maybe with husband behide closed doors
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 1:14 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • I'd try talking to her about personal responsbility, how things may seem like other's people fault and maybe the do contribute to her decisions, but ultimately they are her decisions and responsble for herself. Explain how her actions today will affect her in the immediate and long term future.
    I also like the idea of the constant reminders until she gets annoyed. That worked for my youngest.
    blessedwboysx3

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 1:48 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • LOL LOVE your answer mommy11260! Good tactics...I'll be tryin' that one. ;0)
    Loryl

    Answer by Loryl at 3:14 PM on Jul. 15, 2010

  • Its her age. Plus she was bullied, but its her age mom...she is being a perfectly normal teen ager unfortunately lol. Everyone is to blame except them self. I am blamed if it rains. Everything is everyone else's fault. Its actually good to know that Im not alone!
    bellamommyof4

    Answer by bellamommyof4 at 1:41 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

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