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I am having a really hard time with this..My sister is having an affair with my ex pastor!

they are both married, he's going thru a divorce he's lost the church ( they say he was taking drugs) , my bil has got him working for his company & is clueless, this is all just wrong! I look at her & just wat to beat her ass! How can they be so inconsiderate? Or should I just continue to say nothing & watch this blow up in their face?

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Asked by Anonymous at 8:27 AM on Oct. 1, 2008 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (12)
  • Tough situation. My advice would be to sit down with your sister and have a serious conversation with her about her actions and how they affect others.

    Answer by KristiS11384 at 8:33 AM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • Have you talked to HER? She's your sister, and while I'm sure she won't "appreciate" you calling her on this, she's really the go-to person for you in this situation. Beyond that, I can't tell you what to do. All I can say is, if it were me being cheated on, and someone knew, I'd want them to tell me.


    Answer by DusterMommy at 8:34 AM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • Talk to your sister, in a non confronataional way. If she is unreasonable, just sit backand watch it all blow up! They are human and make mistakes, but there is really nothing you can do about it unfortunatly.
    If you did tell your BIL, he would probably resent you (And your sister would too) so you would not be able to be there to suppport him when he does find out for himself. Lies have a way of coming up sooner or later. I wish you luck and try not to stress too much over it!

    Answer by isra1986 at 9:35 AM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • I would tell her that she's being unfair to her hubby, and either she can tell him or I would. He has a right to know, so does the pastor's wife, and if the cheaters won't tell, then someone else needs to. Sorry you have to be in the middle of it. :-(

    Answer by degsyuna at 9:35 AM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • I would talk to her about how you feel, maybe your advice will help her to realize it is wrong. If not, then you cannot do anything else but just let it play out, but your conscious will be clear knowing you tried to help.

    Answer by seakla at 10:31 AM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • I disagree with some posters..... only on this point.... this is your sister (not just some associate friend) - IF< IF PaceMyself

    Answer by PaceMyself at 11:27 AM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • Okay, I don't know what happened...... there was a full answer there.... but it went haywire... guess I was meant to shut-up.... lol

    Answer by PaceMyself at 11:47 AM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • Well, let me just say sister is one of those people that doesnt like to "be told what to do" so because of that I dont even talk to her anymore because of a fight over her bf and her, when I got involved it turned into my fault and the 2 of them are happy as clams, and dont even talk to me anymore...I wouldnt say nothing...It will make your relationship with your sister blow up..not saying that ur sister is like mine or whatever...but I think it would make ur relationship turn ugly...Let them deal with it...And if anyone asks... you dont know anything...U would think that your blood relative would take ur help willingly but its the opposite...they need to learn on their own...I posted anon cause I dont want her to know I wrote this answer...thanks and Good Luck!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:03 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • What they are doing is wrong, but it's their business, If you bring it up to your sister, and then her husband finds out, she may accuse you of telling him. I think you should just keep quiet and let them play with fire till they get burnt.

    Answer by pagan_mama at 1:02 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • thanks ladies,
    I'm not going to say anything but it hurts me to the core, I work @ walmart & I see these church members all the time & they look at me different now ( it may just be me taking it wrong idk) but she's heading down a dead end road going 9omph & I can't stop her! & him omg i've confided in him b4 he was my preacher! It's all just so NASTY, SHE PICKS UP HIS CHILDREN IN THE MORNINGS FROM HIS SOON TO BE EX-WIFE & TAKES THEM TO SCHOOL the wife has no clue either. ~ God forgive them!

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:39 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

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