Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Getting tubes tied

What is the process? does it hurt?! I'm pregnant with my 5th baby and have decided that I'm kinda done having kids, not only is my body telling me to stop by having complications with my last 2 pregnancy's, I started backwards and ended up having a family first, I'm 24 and ready to start my career but it's gonna be hard if I keep having kids, I feel like I've already experienced evey aspect of pregnancy, I've had 2 singleton girls, a set of identical twin boys and am pregnant with a singleton boy. I wasn't planning on having another child so soon but dammit depo shot didn't work. I'm scared that I'll regret it, and that I'll lose this sense of womanhood with getting my tubes tied. I just know that it'll be the responsible thing to do. How did you know when you were done what was the procedure and did you regret it?


Asked by babyangelromero at 4:29 AM on Jul. 16, 2010 in Health

Level 17 (4,048 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Oh, and please believe me, but having kids / reproducing is NOT what makes you a woman, or productive as a woman. Getting pg / having a baby is the easy part. MOTHERING the kids, taking care of them, being there for them, loving them - THOSE are the things that make us productive, as far as this goes. (Not to mention that there are lots of other ways that women, just like men, can be productive in their lives!)

    My aunt, for example, can't have kids. She is the adopted mom of 2, and has been a GREAT mom to them, very productive. MUCH more so than, say, some crack head that keeps having kids but mistreats them, neglects them, etc.

    Your identity and your worth is NOT in your ovaries or your womb. It's in your heart, and in your mind, and in your actions! And, even if you want to still think that giving birth is an important part of this, you've "been there, done that" - you don't have anything else to "prove".


    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:34 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • i dont have my tubes tied but i do have a girlfriend who has six kids, two sets of twins and two singletons, and she is sexy and smart and does well in life, i also have a friend who had four kids and lost a baby and isnt doing so well in life and she got her tubes tied and it is very hard on her emotinally they are both 27 years of age, i hope that helps you!

    Answer by emleejanedom at 4:51 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • My sister got her tubes tied at 22, after 2 kids, boy and girl. She had a vbac and then had them tied.. and said the recovery was quicker than her c-section. I asked her if she's ever regretted it and she said no. I plan to get mine done after 2 or 3 kids. (depending if the next one is a boy or a girl.)

    Answer by MomtoElliett at 5:22 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • Ok, I didn't have my tubes tied, but I was willing to. My dh had a vasectomy. Basically, if our 2nd was a c-section like our 1st (he was an emerg. c-sect), then I was getting my tubes tied because they were already in there. If not, then he was going to have a vasectomy, because it was an easier procedure medically speaking for him to have it done than me. There were medical as well as personal reasons for this choice.

    I CAN tell you though that 16 yrs later after my dh had a vasectomy, neither of us regret it. We love our kids, and we're glad we had them (we were also young when we had ours, but we only had 2), we don't regret not having more. Our sex life is wonderful, because we don't have to worry about the b.c. And not being able to have kids (yes, technically, I can, but it's medically not a good idea for me, and he had the operation, so...) has NOT made either of us feel less like a man or a woman.


    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 6:29 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • My sister had her tubes tied at 23 after she had her second child. She is now 37 and has never regreted it. If people ask her if she plans on having more children, she tells them "The factory has been turned into a playground"

    Answer by layh41407 at 6:40 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • I actually lost one of my twins, which is why I never wanted to have kids again but especially not this soon and then I got pregnant, blessing?! I don't know but I'm having him, I talked to my husband about this, he supports me but in reality I just don't want to have any more kids. I love the kids I have now. I guess it'll give me a sense of uselessness. Women are meant to have kids and reproduce and I feel I've done my part. It's just hard on my body. With my twins I had alot of complications and with this baby I'm having a few, I just can't keep doing this and risk having another baby, I just don't want to regret it and I don't want to feel like less of a woman because I have my tubes tied.

    Comment by babyangelromero (original poster) at 4:57 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • I got the Essure everything turned out okay.

    Answer by mamaofficer at 7:15 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • When I was pregnant with my 3rd child both hubs and I agreed that #3 would be our last as we both felt that our family was complete. Since #3 was a planned c-section we decided I would get my tubes tied at the same time that way we would not have to worry about birth control or worry about an unexpected 'surprise'. It has been 4 years and I do not regret it at all! I am glad I had it done, and given the choice I would do it over again.

    Answer by MizLee at 9:11 AM on Jul. 16, 2010