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Biting... Does anyone have children that bite that can offer some advice?

My son is going to be 2 in Sept and he has already gotten kicked out of one daycare for biting. Hes been doing it for a while at his new daycare too but they dont seem like they are going to kick him out... YET... And a parent of another child that he keeps biting is getting mad and has an attitude about it... Yeah I feel bad hes biting but I keep being told "Its a phase, he will grow out of it, theres nothing you can do" So Im stuck, and that mom made me so mad... Like I wasnt doing my job as a mom or something... I just wondered if anyone had a similar story and could relate and maybe give advise :) Thanks!

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QueenValerie

Asked by QueenValerie at 10:27 AM on Jul. 16, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 3 (19 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • I was a parent of a child that had another child bite and kick her so I know what it feels like on the other end. My child started to bite when she was little and I would bite back. It fixed the problem because she didn't understand that what she was doing hurt until it was done to her (and I didn't bite hard). Then when she went to school and was subject to being abused I got mad because no one was doing anything about it. Just think if it was your kid and he was coming home with bite marks and bruises from some one else.
    Savymom25

    Answer by Savymom25 at 10:50 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • first know how good it feels to bite when you are frustrated and don't have the words to make things happen. It is a phase, but it also works really well for kids, so the pattern gets going with people really upset over biting.

    I can see a bite coming~as a teacher I would have tagged your little guy and helped him with kids. If a kid is about to bite, I get in and stop them before they can get their mouth on an arm or a finger (you just are faster than them with blocking hand or stop their forehead).

    I'm sick of "use your words" when kids are frustrated...they can't pull words out well yet. At child's level, you can get in there and protect the other kid (who is wanting to run from biter) and keep the biter in the problem and help them problem solved without getting mad.

    some people use apples or bread and things kids can bite, either in the moment or in "time out" in the child is really out of control.
    surfcitymom

    Answer by surfcitymom at 10:52 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • i'm a sahm so i can only offer the advice that worked for me...it is a phase, and he will grow out of if. when kenzie would bite we would be our finger to her lip and say no, it hurts mom/dad, and put her in a time out. it took a while to break her of it, but it worked. i don't believe in biting back, but i've heard that works too.
    mom_to_kenzie

    Answer by mom_to_kenzie at 11:18 AM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • That is tough.. I have had another child bite my daughter and I felt sooo bad for her. I couldnt protect her and it felt awful. I know its not your fault, but go easy on the other mom. Im sure you have had a helpless feeling at some point.. and Im sure that is just what is going on with the other mom. As for the biting.. I agree that he needs to be shown other ways to deal with the feelings he gets when he wants to bite. Maybe tell him that when he feels upset he can go to the couch and hit the pillow. Or some way to let out that physical frustration he might be feeling. I wish you the best of luck

    hmdfeather

    Answer by hmdfeather at 4:04 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • I do think of the parents and the kids getting bit and i feel bad but I dont know what to do... I was even a little glad that he got bit a couple times as well so he knew how if felt, and if i did go and bite him back hed just laugh at me (yeah hes one of THOSE kids...) the only time he gets anything is when I REALLY yell at him and I think it scares him so I dont like doing that... I try to talk to him, say "Biting is bad, it hurts and its not nice" I always tell him before he goes to daycare to be good and NO BITING!

    The daycare is trying to keep an eye on him but there are only 2 teachers at the most for maybe 10 kids so they dont have much time to catch him every time. They always tell me "he just leaned over and bit, he didnt seem to have a reason" so i dont know. Hes just an intense child lol he does everything to the extreme it seems and this just seems to be one of those things. I HOPE he does grow out of it and soon
    QueenValerie

    Comment by QueenValerie (original poster) at 11:49 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

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