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What is some advice you have for new stepmoms?

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kicknscreamn222

Asked by kicknscreamn222 at 11:58 AM on Jul. 16, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 7 (203 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • be patient.
    misunderstood1

    Answer by misunderstood1 at 12:01 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • Love your new step~child as much as possible... And, if all else fails... IGNORE!

    smokisses

    Answer by smokisses at 12:05 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • Make sure that you and Bio-dad have set the rules so that you show a united front for discipline rather than undermining each other and confusing the child. This will lead to you being the evil-stepmom and cause problems between you and DH.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 12:07 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • Go out of your way to create a bond between you and your step child. Whatever that may consist of, and many that means doing what the child likes (like texting for teenagers, or floor play for little ones etc)

    If the child seems hell bent against a relationship, let it go. And don't take it personal. And if it is really an issue (like the child disobeys you) make sure you DH knows that you will not be, act or get volunteered to babysit, or "parent" the child in any way. This (when accepted by your partner) will help avoid problems in the marriage.

    Don't talk bad about ANYONE in the childs family. If BM does something you don't like and the child is telling you about ask the child how he/she feels about it but keep your opinions of the person to yourself.
    outstandingLove

    Answer by outstandingLove at 12:09 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • talk to dh and make sure your on the same page and have a united front (my sd asked one time if she could have her toys out, when we were about to eat or leave, and i told her no, that she needed to wait..and then she went and asked her dad and he told her yeah)...be patient, and set a schedule for when your step child is there, so they follow the same (or somewhat of the same) schedule as your other kid(s)..never favor one more, if one gets something, then so does the other (my dh did this when sd was in, and told me i should pay more attention to sd, which left our dd on the back burner..sorry not gonna give all the attention to sd, and have every one else ignore the child who's always here.)
    mom_to_kenzie

    Answer by mom_to_kenzie at 1:00 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

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