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How do you feel about parents who's kids are on medicine for ADD/ADHD that say in front of the child, "He's behaving so good today because he had his pill, YAY!"

I have neighbors and they say things like this all the time right in front of their son but then when he say things like " I can't be good today because I didn't have a pill!" they get mad and tell him not to use the pills as a crutch or an excuse.

I'm not debating the use of medicine for ADD/ADHD (although that's another good debate) I'm having issue with the parents talking like that then getting mad at the kids and wondering why the child is using the "pills" as an excuse.

Do you think it's a crutch for both parents and child? What has happened to taking responsiblity for one's actions reguardless of the impairment or disablity?

(before anyone bashs me for anything be aware that I have an autistic son and have never let him use the fact of his disablity negates his responsiblity for his behavoir)

 
Cindy18

Asked by Cindy18 at 1:27 PM on Jul. 16, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Level 28 (33,953 Credits)
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Answers (23)
  • well I have never been a fan of medicating children for add/adhd......the kids turn into zombies, the dont sleep well, they dont eat well, they lose weight and in general are more sickly......parents need to learn how to manage their child, say no, get them therapy if they need it, behavorial therapy is great!!!!
    I have a daughter with aspergers and she is not on any medications just therapys....aside from the occasional stimming she appear s very normal....she is smart,well mannered, and very capable........its called discipline folks.
    michaux

    Answer by michaux at 11:42 PM on Jul. 17, 2010

  • It's absolutely terrible - it takes the responsibility for the behavior away from the individual and gives it to a medication.
    aliceinalgonac

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 1:28 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • i get upset. I don't think it is right for anyone to depend on a pill and at a young age hearing their parents say that makes them think they NEED a pill for the rest of their lives.
    zoejains_momma

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 1:29 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • pathetic was the first thing that came to my mind.
    ItsMe89

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 1:29 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • I don't think there's anything wrong with relying on a pill to help with ADD/ADHD or any other problem as long as your getting therapy too. It's an odd thing to talk about though, because it really should be a private matter...nobody needs to know your medical history...lol It's sad that people think they NEED to be on medication for the rest of their lives....because only very few cases end up like that.
    CAGirl4

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 1:30 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • I would hope that those parents seek alternative methods to treat their child. Somethings just changing their diet does wonders! Not all parents are aware of that, you could encourage it.
    The only reason I could of think of as to why they do that is to encourage their son to not miss a day (pill). No child wants to be considered "bad" to their parents, at least not the kids I know.
    parrishsky

    Answer by parrishsky at 1:30 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • It's really bad to do this. I don't get some people.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 1:31 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • I have 2 children on med for adhd and I would never say that... b/c I KNOW my kids can behave off their meds and I'm not gonna let them use that as a reason not to control their own behavior!
    SWEETPEAS3MOM

    Answer by SWEETPEAS3MOM at 1:32 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • i think it's totally a crutch for the parent. I have a friend who refuses to medicate her child. Teachers in school kept telling her that her child was disruptive to the class & needed to be on meds..etc, etc...

    Well, you knwo what she did? She pulled her child from school & taught him at home. This child will be graduating college with a 4.0 grade point average. He is so wicked smart. Anyway, i think that medication is for parents who don't have the time to work WITH their kids. There are many ways to go around ADHD & ADD. School teachers are so swamped with kids, that it's hard for them to give them the singled attention that they need to learn. So, most parents take the easy way out & medicate their kids to make their life easier.

    I think it's AWEFUL when parents say stuff like that & i have heard it too. I have heard them say things like "well he's not on his meds, so he might act out" it sickens me...
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 1:33 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

  • This is a touchy subject, with a child on ADHD meds it takes time and patience and therapy to get the dosage right. When he didn't take his meds I would catch myself asking him if he took his pill. But I realized that every time I do this it's because the way he is acting. I didn't want him to think that every time he acted up I would ask him if he took his pill. For many years (with doctors approval) we would let him skip his weekend dosages but most of time he would have headaches on monday so now he is 7 day a week meds. As I said it takes time, patience, love and working closely with doctor for this medication to work and for our kid to benefit. Some people don't realize this and use the meds as a crutch and excuse.
    adakbride

    Answer by adakbride at 1:38 PM on Jul. 16, 2010

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