Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

how long were you the other woman for?

did you know your boyfriend was married? how long did he stay with you after his wife found out? did he divorce her for you?did he leave you eventually? and if he did leave, how long did he stay with you for?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:12 PM on Oct. 1, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (33)
  • Why does this question just rub me the wrong way? Sounds like phishing for acceptance and/or confirmation. I normally don't respond to loaded questions, but I'm going to make an exception with this one. Any woman who would continue to see a man that is married deserves to have a boot up her butt.... The Other Woman is not a good title to have... it's a shameful one. If you love a married a man, then you are loving in vain, because he can't or won't be there and you deserve to have a man that is all yours.. not just on Wednesday at the local Motel 6. And HIS WIFE deserves to have her husband to herself.... if they split that's one thing. But I think any woman who goes around with a married man has some morality and insecurity issues.

    Answer by PaceMyself at 1:31 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • We were together for a couple weeks and she was cheating on him too...they broke it off and we're together for 2 years after nad have a beautiful little girl... But they were in the process of breaking it off just not official yet, she even told me that before him and I hooked up.

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:35 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • my ex he didn't tell me he was married, it took me 2 weeks to find out cause his wife was talking to me about it, witch it was nice that she was friendly about it. i cut it off right away and he left her for awhile but they got back togther and i was thankful that i never went out with him cause he became a lazy guy and doesn't work plus he would steal, and his wife knew he does this cause he did this to her all the time so i wasn't the only 1 he has did this too and when he tries to talk i walk away and i make sure my hubby knows he is the one but i will never let a guy use me like that and i didn't want to be know as a home wreaker i also knew i can do better i just wanted to get laid ..

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:36 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • 3 or 4 different times over a 19 year period. Yes, his wife knew about me, as did all his family. He was separated, then not, then was, then not, blah blah blah. I knew he would never be mine totally.....but what made anyone think that's what I was in it for?? We have alot in friends, but I'm well aware that if he cheated to be with me, and I ended up with him, he'd cheat on me as well. So it was all for fun, companionship, and fulfilling what was needed at the various times.

    Answer by EireLass at 1:52 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • I agree with pacemyself. It doesnt matter that the man is willing to do it. The woman should have enough respect for herself that she would never lay with a married man. It is wrong no matter how you do the math. I always put myself in someone elses shoes. I always think "what impact will this have on my family?" I have never and will never cheat on my husband. When I married him it was my way of saying I love you and you're penis is the only one I want inside me for the rest of my life. I would be so devistated if he was cheating on me. Maybe we should hear what the women who have been cheated on think.....
    I know I never want it done to me so I will never do it to my husband.

    Answer by LovinEveryDay at 2:07 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • What "pacemyself" said. Once you find out your guy is married, it's time for him to hit the pavement.

    Answer by BigMommaJesca at 2:37 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • My father cheated on my mother for years with this stupid woman in our town, he even once told my mom that he never loved her. He eventually got to the point where he left my mom and went to stay at a hotel and when he called his "whore" (who was also married with kids) to leave her husband and do the same she refused. My parents are still together and this happened while I was in High school. I knew about it and all I have to say is I went through my teen years feeling so ashamed of my family and embarrassed. So if you are thinking about being with a married man... think about who he might have at home that also knows. It still affects me today inmy marriage and I wasnt even the one that did it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:44 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • I think most women willing to sleep with a married man are either kidding themselves (into thinking he made a "mistake" with his marriage, and will fix it by marrying her) or have poor or no self-esteem. Why would you want to be second best, less than his number one priority? Why settle for someone else's seconds?
    I'm sure there are cases where the other woman and her married man eventually end up together...and I'm sure there are even couples who start out that way and go on to live a long and happily married life....but I'm also sure those are very few and far between, and certainly, I am not going to be laying down with a man who's having sex with ANYONE else.

    Answer by jespeach at 2:52 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • If he'll cheat on her, he'll cheat on you too.

    Answer by riotgrrl at 3:05 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

  • In my younger years I had relationships with 3 married men. One much much older, one closer to my age and the third actually was my ex boyfriend who after we broke up because he was not ready for a committment, married a girl he hardly knew.

    I must say this" When someone goes into this kind of relationship hoping to eventually marry that person, then they are fooling themselves. " As stated above If he'll cheat on her, he'll cheat on you"

    To me it was more the feeling that I had nothing to loose and nothing to gain, I was in control of the situation and could walk away anytime because I had NO expectations!! Just a good time!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:47 PM on Oct. 1, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Relationships
how would you feel?

Next question overall (Babies (0-12 months))
when can i??