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Stay together or apart?

I have been seeing a man for 3 months almost. We have a fun time together. Not in love with him. But I cant help but hate feeling like I am disposable to him. He tells me how Great, Beautiful , awesome , sweet I am all the time. We both have 3 kids.. and both sets of our kids love each other.
I care about him a lot- But he is very confident in a cocky mannor ( not about looks), Cares for me but seems to distance himself, and is more selfish then I would like.
What do I do to make it better? or to Make me feel like I am not someone who could just be thrown away without a thought? If I talk to him about any of this I am sure i'll hear about how emotional I am ( which Isn't often but 2 times a month is a lot for him! )

HELP!!! Please give the best advice.

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MommySteph1011

Asked by MommySteph1011 at 10:10 PM on Jul. 17, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (675 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Seems like it wouldn't be something that you'd be happy with in the long run if the flags are going up now about things you find not attractive about him.
    CAGirl4

    Answer by CAGirl4 at 10:11 PM on Jul. 17, 2010

  • You can't change who someone is. And you haven't been seing him very long either really. Why not just keep dating and not get serious and see how it goes? Why 3 months in do you need to change him?
    Its not like you have to marry the guy! :)
    Ladywithtwo

    Answer by Ladywithtwo at 10:13 PM on Jul. 17, 2010

  • If you are asking questions like this now? What is going to change I would think about it before making a commitment. GL Momma
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 10:17 PM on Jul. 17, 2010

  • I am not asking to change him at all.
    MommySteph1011

    Comment by MommySteph1011 (original poster) at 10:18 PM on Jul. 17, 2010

  • well maybe he feels sorta the same way too... both of you have been in a relationship before and depends on the age I know more of what I want the next time around.... not that I'm picky and not valueing the next person just that I dont want to or deserve just to settle...... I'm 40 by the way and after a 18 yr marriage I know what I want and dont want.....
    tabby1catt

    Answer by tabby1catt at 10:25 PM on Jul. 17, 2010

  • He may distance himself because he is afraid of getting hurt again. Since you do say you dont love him. Take it slow and see where it leads. He seems like a good guy.
    LizzieAnnesMom

    Answer by LizzieAnnesMom at 10:52 PM on Jul. 17, 2010

  • I have some friends who have a similar situation. The biggest issue is that they both have self confidence/trust issues because of the hurt they have had. Maybe he is feeling the same insecurities as you are but we all know that men don't talk about how they feel. Best of luck sweetie.
    hsmominky

    Answer by hsmominky at 12:20 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

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