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Is it healthy to complain about your spouse?

I think it is, right? Sometimes I just want to vent about DH to blow off some steam. But I usually feel bad for talking about him without him being there. I don't make things up or exaggerate the story or anything. They are just little things that he does to drive me crazy. I guess I'm just wondering if its okay? I tried thinking how I would feel about him complaining about me, and it doesn't really bother me, if hes honest about what he says. I asked him tonight if he does, and he said, "When I need to." I thought it was a good answer. lol


Asked by LucasMama08 at 3:35 AM on Jul. 18, 2010 in Relationships

Level 18 (6,382 Credits)
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Answers (13)
  • You know, I do the same thing! My husband drives me so mad that I talk about himto my friends. I don't lie about him, I simply tell the truth and it pisses him off! Well baby if you wasn't such a ass
    I wouldn't be complainig lol

    Answer by devinebeauty at 8:57 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • Yes, as long as you do it behind is back. ;)

    Answer by ZombieHousewife at 3:37 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • It's normal. ...but i think it's only healthy to a certain extent.
    talking about the negative tends to let us forget about the positive. negative talking narrows our memory and focus to the negative things we are discussing.
    Yes, i vent about my husband at times.
    But many times when i am angry, upset, frustrated or whatever at him i try to keep in mind what his real intentions might have been. Or how he goes out of his way to make me happy. I try to keep in mind what kind of stress he might be under and what i might not have taken into account when i first felt the "negative" feelings.

    Anyways, sorry for my little rant there.
    yes it is normal.
    and as long as it is not extreme it is healthy too.

    Answer by outstandingLove at 3:40 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • well, I think we all need to let off some steam sometimes by talking to friends about some stuff that bugs us about our partners ,,, well, I think that if what you are saying to people isnt too private or if you know that it wont hurt him if he founds out about it, I think it's not the worst thing ,,

    Answer by mommy_sam at 3:39 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I think it's healthy to vent your frustrations, rather then letting them all build up!

    Answer by Ashlynnsmommy07 at 3:42 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I think its normal and healthy other wise you'd have all that bottled up frustartion in you and thats not good for your mental health... it'd drvie you crazy i vent bout my SO but only to my sister cuz other ppl dont understand our relationship

    Answer by jazmya_mom at 4:38 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • Of course! I would complain about him but only up to a certain point. I don't divulge things that are very personal or very detrimental to his character.

    Answer by LavenderRose10 at 5:00 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • heres my take on it, I normally will to like myself, I don't share this kind of information with my friends cause they end up hearing the bad and then I'm on the phone with him telling him I love him and miss him so I just don't talk shit about him, I do vent though, on paper or on here but I know that after things will get better or I'll get over it and then I'll feel like shit and wanna take it all back.

    Answer by babyangelromero at 5:23 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • Very healthy, it is a way to release the things you can't change.

    Answer by older at 9:06 AM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • It's not a "release" as many people thing - it's a focus on the negative. "Venting" actually increases negative feelings, not reduces them.

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 10:21 AM on Jul. 18, 2010