Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

8 Bumps

Do you think that children of SAHM's have a closer bond with their mother?

First of all, before anyone jumps down my throat, I am asking for your opinion. I'm NOT saying that I think that bonding depends on whether a mom stays at home or not. My mom and I were just contemplating it bc she was a SAHM, and we were always SO close, closer than any of my friends were with their moms. I think that in MY case, it was because she was always home. That's one reason why I chose to stay home with my son. Keep in mind, I am only saying that this is true in my case, not everyone's. I'm sure there are also children of SAHM's that can't stand their mother, lol. Anyways, what do you think?

 
LovingSAHMommy

Asked by LovingSAHMommy at 12:25 PM on Jul. 18, 2010 in Parenting Debate

Level 40 (115,957 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (34)
  • I think during their pre-ful day school years it DOES make a difference! I feel that you learn more about your childrens personalities, their strengths and weaknesses, and their developmental issues, MORE than when you are a full time working mom--not saying you aren;t clued into your children, just that you see things MORE. :o)

    My mother was a extra full-time working mother, and we are not at all close--extended family and my mother's friends are responsible for raising me, and I was a SAHM until my children started full-day school. I feel my children and I are more connected, and they depend on me more for consistency and comfort. Now my husband is WONDERFUL father (I couldn't have asked for a better man), but when push comes to shove, and they need someone to comfort or help them, they come running to me. :o)
    LoriKeet

    Answer by LoriKeet at 12:33 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • i think it depends a lot on the mom. i know some sah moms that ignore their kids most of the day. i know it made me closer to my mom growing up, but other factors drove us apart.
    jennifer588

    Answer by jennifer588 at 12:30 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I think when they are babies it makes you closer. But when they get up older I think time apart is helpful too.
    BlainesMommy09

    Answer by BlainesMommy09 at 12:27 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • Not necessarily. I have a vey good friend who is a SAHM and has a very 'shaky' relation ship with her oldest daughter. I work part time and I have an awesome relation ship with my children. My momther was a WAHM and we were close for many years then drifted a part for some. I don't believe working or not working has sole or even the majority of impact on any relationship but it may help or hinder it depending on other factors.
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 12:29 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • 1 thing does not make or break anything :)
    My mom was a sahm and i dont think it made us closer at all...
    I am a sahm but only time will tell if we are close, but i dont think me being home with her will make that huge difference.
    Sometimes working moms try harder to build that bond since they are away at work so much, as some sahm may know there is "later" so dont spend as much quality time with their kids cause they think just being under the same roof is good enough- and its not. .. 1 on 1 time is most important & being an overall good parent...
    MommaTasha1003

    Answer by MommaTasha1003 at 12:32 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I think it really depends on the person. For me, I was not as close as I am now to my son. I was working and with the military, I maybe got 2 hrs a day with him when he was a baby. He was closer to my mom since she was the one watching him and picking him up and dropping him off at the day care. I knew there was a problem when my 5 month old wanted his day care provider over me. I have been a SAHM with my daughter the entire time and I see a big difference then how it was with my son. However, this is just for my situation.
    pageantgirl3

    Answer by pageantgirl3 at 12:32 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • No. My sis was a SAHM and her kids are now teens. They do not respect her at all, in fact, they listen to me more than her. There are many times I get phone calls from either her or them to help work out an issue. It was easy when I only lived down the street, but now I live 15 minutes away and it's a bit rougher. I feel like I am another mom to them whether I want to be or not. I feel my sis seriously lacks in parenting skills and I have to pick up her slack.

    I've had to work most of my son's life as I was a single mother for many years. Even though he has autism, he and I are very close.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 12:32 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I am a stay at home mom right now and I definitely think it has helped me form stronger bonds with my children. However, I've never been a "working mom" so I honestly don't know if I would have the same bond with them if I had worked.

    My oldest is 3.5 and my youngest is 11 months.

    I do plan on going back to work within the next couple of years so that only one child will have to be in daycare. I might see if I can find something in the evenings though so that I can still be there during the day with them until they're both in school.
    Laila-May

    Answer by Laila-May at 12:34 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • lol. I sound very non committal but it makes sense!
    But_Mommie

    Answer by But_Mommie at 12:30 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I think it soley depends on their overall relationship. It depends on the quality of time spent together doing things and getting to know each other as a whole. If the mothers is interested and in tune with her children, they will have a special bond no matter if she stays at home or works out side of their home.
    QandA

    Answer by QandA at 12:33 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN