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Should a child be required to bring in b-day party invitations for the entire class?

My husband and I actually got into an argument over this a while back, lol. He says that a child should be able to pass out invitations to the majority of the kids if they want to, and exclude some. I said that that was sad, and at that age, they shouldn't have to feel excluded or left out. I say, if you want to pass them out while excluding some, do it outside of the classroom. I guess I just imagined my son at 5 years of age, feeling left out if he was one of the only children not to get invited to a party, and how that would make me feel to know he felt that way. However, my husband says that they may as well learn at an early age that not all kids are popular, and that they won't always be included! I thought he sounded really callous when he said that! I have a feeling he'll change his mind if our son is ever left out of anything. I also told him to plan on paying for my son's entire class at his birthday parties. :


Asked by LovingSAHMommy at 8:39 PM on Jul. 18, 2010 in Parenting Debate

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Answers (29)
  • Agreed. A child should be able to invite whomever s/he wants to have at a party, but it should not be done in a setting where other children will be excluded.

    Answer by neebug3766 at 8:42 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I agree with your husband

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 8:42 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I agree with you on this.

    Answer by JeremysMom at 8:40 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I don't know how it works in K and up, but I know in my son's Pre-K it had to be everyone, or all boys or all girls.

    Answer by beckie66 at 8:41 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I've always just let my kids give invitations to who they want to come, their friends. Though their school doesn't allow them to hand out invitations in class.

    Answer by DesertRose75 at 8:45 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • All kids should be invited if the invites are passed out at school. It sucks to be the kid who isn't invited.

    Answer by Fallaya at 8:47 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • I like the all boys or all girls option too.

    Answer by JeremysMom at 8:42 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • It depends on the situation

    Answer by mamaofficer at 8:44 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • eh, I really don't think it should be a requirement to invite the whole class. My sons last school did make it a requirement, but the school he attended last year did not have that as a requirement. At his age, he doesnt want to invite the girls. Which was fine with me. For his birthday he invited all the boys in his class. No big deal. He's never came home upset about not being invited to a party either. He knows that some parents are like his mom...and can only afford a certain number of kids,lol.

    Answer by kimberlyinberea at 8:44 PM on Jul. 18, 2010

  • this is why etiquette states that you should "send out" (not hand out) invitations at least 2-3 weeks before an event.

    Answer by MomOfDagJag at 8:49 PM on Jul. 18, 2010