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I cheated on my fiance with a stripper...

Ok, so please be nice about this. I am very committed to my fiance, we have been together for about four years. I have NEVER cheated on him before, never even thought about it. I love him and only him and want to be with him forever. He is the father of my daughter as well.

So, it was my best friends birthday and we went out to dinner downtown. After she wanted to go to a male strip club which is fine, I have been there before. So anyway, long story short we all were REALLY drunk... something I don't make a habit of but it was her b-day night. One of the dancers there ended up being a guy I knew from like 6-7 years ago. So we were talking and catching up after he came off stage. Completely innocent at that point. Then later in the night he came up and kissed me completely out of the blue, and I kissed him back. I immedietely realized that I had done and stopped and we left. I feel terrible. So, do I tell my fiance or not?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:07 AM on Jul. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (21)
  • YIKES! Sounds like a mess. Yes, if it was me in your position, I would definitely tell my fiance. If you don't it's going to eat you up and WHEN (not if) your SO finds out, it will be much worse. GL!
    renea20

    Answer by renea20 at 9:13 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • I would tell him that I kissed a stripper when I went out. I prolly wouldn't mention that I knew the stripper previously...

    MomtoElliett

    Answer by MomtoElliett at 9:13 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • No need to spoil a good relationship with one little mistake, it is not like you had sex or an affair with him. I wouldn't let on that anything happened you would be putting importance on something that has none.
    older

    Answer by older at 9:15 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • i did something similar and it almost turned into sex but i stopped it because it felt wrong and sinful. i told my him because it was right. but i did keep it a secret for awhile and it ate at me constantly and the wonderful man that i have forgave me and completely understood (there was other stuff on his part that led to it, but it was still entirely my fault). i say tell him before it messes up ur relationship from the inside out.
    khmymommi

    Answer by khmymommi at 9:15 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • I don't think you did anything wrong unless there was more involved than your are saying, a simple kiss. If your mind wasn't really focused on the guy, then I'd let it go. No confession to the fiance is needed. And in my opinion, should be avoided. Now that you know this can happen, then be more alert about it.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 9:17 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • I would not say that i knew the guy. I might not even tell him at all if it was just a kiss. I was thinking you had sex with him.

    Anyhow, if the guilt was eating at me, i would tell him that the stripper kissed me. I would not say i kissed him back. But, there would be a good chance i would never say anything.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 9:18 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • I think i would definately tell my man. Wouldn't you want him to tell you? It will make it allot worse if he hears it from someone else.
    wildwiccan83

    Answer by wildwiccan83 at 9:19 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • So it was just the kiss? Just me, but I would have to tell my fiance. Something similar to this happened to me and it ate away at me so I finally had to tell him. I get deep into the guilt. I was dreaming about it, etc. It took such a load off my mind. I was aware, however, that things might turn out badly. Luckily he got over it and is not the type to throw it back at me in the future. Now, if you are not the type to get deep into the guilt it may not bother you so much, but I would be afraid that one of your friends might tell him (or were just with one friend?). No one else knew what I had done. Be prepared for bad fallout and be ready to live with it. You know your fiance's temperment best. Good luck, no matter what you decide.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:20 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • I would tell him. Things like this have a way of getting back to the one person you don't want it getting back to, so be honest about it NOW and that will mean more to him than you hiding it and him THEN finding out.
    AllAboutKeeley

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 9:21 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • i wouldnt tell. It was just a drunk kiss..that guy put you on the spot. you felt guilty and left..you did the right thing. no need to tell him and make him have bad ideas and thoughts in his head.
    shay1130

    Answer by shay1130 at 9:22 AM on Jul. 19, 2010

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