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3 Bumps

What should I do with this child?

My daughter is 8 months old and the definition of daddys girl, if she tries playing with cords or the computer all he has to say is no and she'll cry like he beat her, and she stops crying and doesnt mess with the computer, however with me if i say no she looks me straight in the eye and does it again, after saying no twice, the third time i will smack her hand,and then she smacks me back! i will take her and put her somewhere else smack her hand and tell her no. she still goes straight to what i am telling her not to, why does she listen to him and not me?

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Asked by Laura_Cruz at 1:13 PM on Jul. 19, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 10 (487 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • its very normal. young children typically go through cycles of prefering one parent over the other and back and forth. hubby and i would joke about it in fact with our youngest. its just a phase

    Answer by sati769leigh at 1:15 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • I wish i new the answer to that queston myself !

    Answer by littlekitty2002 at 1:16 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • she probably fears him, she knows that all you will do is smack her hand. i would give her a time out in her crib with no toys so she can't run to what you're telling her not to. daddy's voice probably scares her, have you tried your scary mom voice. i can tell my son no twice to something but if i use my scary voice he really knows!

    Answer by angevil53 at 1:17 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • Probably because she is around you more and she wants to see what she can get away with. I would change the pattern of the way you punish her if what you are doing isn't working until you find something that does. She has to listen to you to, so don't give up because you can do it. I know sometimes it is so hard but you are not alone. Hope everything works out.

    Answer by Savymom25 at 1:17 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • OMG my sons dont listen to me either....if they listen to one of us its DF....GRRRRR lol

    Answer by oregonduck at 1:18 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • Smacking her hand will not teach her to learn the lesson any better or faster. As you have seen, all it has done is to teach her to hit you back.
    She has a stronger attachment to her mommy, which is good and normal, and that is why she feels "safe" to "test" you. The way your 8 mo old responds to you is totally normal and developmentally appropriate. The best things you can do right now are: Put away things she can't touch/get into etc as much as you can.
    Say "no" in a calm but firm voice and move her away to an appropriate alternative, right away. Don't even expect her to stop, expect that you will have to get up and move her.
    Hang in there and expect to keep this up for at least the next 6 months or so. Don't expect her to be able to "listen" to you before then.

    Answer by maggiemom2000 at 1:36 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • Smacking an 8 month old's hand is not the answer! Redirect or baby proof your house. If you want to discipline the ONLY way I would do it is to put her in a crib without toys for a SHORT time out. But then you run the risk of her associating her crib with punishment and not wanting to sleep in it.
    Your daughter is in one of my least favorite stages. Old enough to get into trouble but not big enough to really do anything about it!
    Run the cords where she can't get to them.

    Answer by JasonsMom2007 at 3:13 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

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