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My cousin and keeping her away from my child

My cousin on my fathers side, is a bad person and i do not want my child around her. But her father, who i am not with anymore, has made the decision on his weekends (to try and get closer to my dads family) to bring her over there. I need to know if there are any ways, other than telling him not to bring her by this woman (which he does not listen to), to make him keep my daughter away from this bad woman. I do not want to make idle threats either, or any threats at all. I just want my daughter safe and she will not be around this woman. What can i do?

Answer Question
 
smilelovesmile

Asked by smilelovesmile at 6:38 PM on Jul. 19, 2010 in Relationships

Level 11 (526 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Why don't you want this perosn around her? Are there any specific reasons other than you may not like her personallly? Has she harmed other children?
    lawmom27

    Answer by lawmom27 at 6:40 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • Dont think you can really do much unless you can prove that she is unsafe for you daughter and then, you will probably have to get her in trouble to be away from her. Hell, my sister's half sister is in foster care with a family who has been in prision and the state wont take her from them to be put with a good family! so i dont think there is much you can do other than try to reason with your ex :(
    babymaddy

    Answer by babymaddy at 6:41 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • She is a addicted to drugs, but this i cannot prove to my DD's father, he will not believe me. She also has a boyfriend who is going to court right now for child pornography, all DD's father has to say is that this man isnt around my child. But how do i know this? My DD's father considers her a great friend and i had discussed with him on multiple occasion that i do not wish my DD to be arouns people like her, he thinks he knows her, but i have been her cousin forever. So i think i know what kind of person she is.
    smilelovesmile

    Comment by smilelovesmile (original poster) at 6:43 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • Maybe you need to sit him down and let him know what happened and maybe you need to sit him down and say not threats but real life consequences for his actions and this is your child threats are just that threats you need to take care of her. GL Momma
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 6:47 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • I have tried this and he says he can hang out with who ever he wants, which i NEVER said anything about him not hanging out with her, just that my daughter is young and i do not wish her to end up eating something that could hurt her. (I.E. pills, coke, hell take a sip off a alcoholic drink) while they are busy chatting. She is my whole world and he has had her 2 weekends, she is 2.5 by the way. And he thinks he knows what is good for her and the type of people children can be around. I do not blow up at him because i can be calm, its just so frustrating i have told him i am NOT trying to control what he does with her, but if i do not bring my daughter around these few people in MY FAMILY, then it is for a good reason and he should trust my judgement of these people. I Just have such a hard time with him because he acts like a 3 y.o. when i suggest something, or try and tell him anything about her!
    smilelovesmile

    Comment by smilelovesmile (original poster) at 6:52 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • Unfortunately, you can't control his choices, just as he can't control yours.
    aliceinalgonac

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 6:55 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • I know i cannot control his choices, i dont want to in any other regard except for this. I know this woman has the potential to put aside things which are right for drugs. What if he asks her to 'babysit' and she gets drugged up, or takes her back to her place with her nasty child porn watching thing she dates? What if mhy daughter gets molested because he doesnt get it? that is MY fault then, how can i make him see that someone who chooses to stay with a man(if he can b called that) who likes children in that way is not right in her own mind. What if she is like this man she is with? My child could be hurt and i just dont know how to get this across to him! He doesnt seem to care if this happens so lkong as he gets to hang out with my cousin! I'm so frustrated and worried she will be harmed, or worse.
    smilelovesmile

    Comment by smilelovesmile (original poster) at 6:59 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • i am so sorry but his time with his child cannot be dictated by you.
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 7:04 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • Don't explain crap to him. Just tell him the woman is NOT coming to your house and you don't want her around your dd.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:35 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

  • get a court order to keep her away if there is some way you can.. My mom did that for me when I was a child and I went to my dad's there was this guy that hung around and got cought molesting my cousin (same age) well she got a laywer and got a protection for us so he couldn't be near us at all! look into that if you can!
    randilinn

    Answer by randilinn at 8:15 PM on Jul. 19, 2010

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