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Are there any moms who breastfed without any support?

I have three kids already, the youngest is 16 months. My DH works 12 a day and I have to take my DD and DS to and from school in a couple of weeks. I have no one to come and help me out to do the cooking, cleaning and taking care of the kids. My DH works out of town. I ended up stressing out too much with the last one so much that my milk dried up. It was horrible for me. The whole experience of not being able to nurse and not being able to take care of the kids. My other kids were nursing every two hours or so when they were nursing. Also, I am afraid of the baby not bonding with my DH. My others were over 1 before they would even let him hold them. How did you moms who had no help survive nursing? I feel horrible for even thinking that I won't be able to do it, and then I feel stupid for feeling this way. Thanks!!


Asked by Anonymous at 1:46 PM on Jul. 20, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

This question is closed.
Answers (10)
  • It sounds like nursing might be a blessing for you to just sit for a moment and relax. Not to mention saving time and money not preparing bottle. It was really hard for me to learn that sometimes the dishes just don't get done, and the laundry can be folded later, but its true. Just concentrate on taking care of family first. Best of luck to you!

    Answer by GingerMom33 at 2:51 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • honey, sometimes you just don't get the dishes done. That part is negotiable.

    I use a crock pot to make two or three meals at once, heating up the leftovers as wraps and in casseroles on dh's day off. PM if you want, I'll walk you through my day and how I manage.

    Answer by lovinangels at 1:48 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • I had no help but I just took it day by day. In face my MIL and mother kept telling me how selfish I was for not giving them a chance to feed the baby and that I need to either pump or FF. My husband even try to convince me to stop. No one was supportive of me doing it but I went 7 months straight. I even had a 2 yr old to take care of on top of cleaning and cooking. You just need to adjust to a schedule that works best. It took a couple months but I was able to get things done and be able to get down to the hour when my LO was going to be hungry. GL mama I hope things work out for you.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 1:50 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • *fact

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 1:50 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • It sounds like you have a lot on your shoulders. The best thing you can do for yourself is to get some help. If you can afford it, get someone to come in an clean the house at least once a week - that would eliminate a lot of stress.

    Answer by neebug3766 at 1:52 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • I did without any help. I have 3 kids and they are 2 years apart. Sometimes things are going to be hard but sometimes you just don't get the chores done.

    Answer by reesemom at 1:56 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • I agree with other comments- plan for easiest possible menus (no one ever died from sandwiches or leftovers for dinner) and housework waiting isn't the end of the world either. As for others bonding with the baby, your DH can be responsible for so many other things- bringing baby to you to feed, changing and putting baby back to bed, bath time, etc. that can bond him to the baby just fine. There are some wraps and slings that can even be worn to nurse, so you could multitask, although in the best scenario nursing is a time to at least sit quietly and try to focus on your baby, even if you are watching the other little ones at the same time. If you have the baby before school starts back up mabye there is a student in your area who could come to play with and entertain the other kids for a few hours at a time to give you a break. Just do your best, there will be tough days but you do what you can and go from there. Good Luck!

    Answer by MaryMW at 2:14 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • I have nursed three kids with very little help at all. Sometimes I get it all done, most times I don't. Just know you are not alone!

    Answer by khedy at 3:07 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • cleaning can wait except for essentials. your best friend should be a wrap or sling. and the vast majority of babies are mom centered. It is just the way it is, even for the most social of babies.

    Answer by amileegirl at 3:39 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • "My DH works out of town."

    "Also, I am afraid of the baby not bonding with my DH. My others were over 1 before they would even let him hold them. "

    Was he working out of town before, too? Because there's a cause and effect thing here. Bonding is BEING THERE. Feeding doesn't matter, dad's presence does. If he's working out of town, expect the same problems even if you formula feed because *he's not there.*

    Leave the cleaning be. Admission to see the baby is a chore or a casserole for anyone who visits.

    Answer by gdiamante at 4:54 PM on Jul. 20, 2010