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Temper Tantrums

Hey ladies, my son is almost 2 and his tantrums are outrageous! I've seen other kids out in public who cry or whine about something that displeases them but my son absolutely SCREAMS!! He will SCREAM about anything that upsets him or anytime i tell him no or take something dangerous away from him and it is so bad that my husband and I do not take him out in public unless it is absolutely necessary. Does anyone have any advice about how to get him to stop screaming because we would really like to be able to go out to dinner or something :) We have tried time outs and everything and nothing seems to work.

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shortleo

Asked by shortleo at 2:29 PM on Jul. 20, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 14 (1,508 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • When my kids start throwing a tantrum, they have to do it in their room. I send them to it and tell them not to come out until they are done. Eventually he will learn that tantrums do not get him what he wanted and that they are pointless. You have to be consistent! Don't let him know that it's frustrating, do NOT give in to what ever it is he's wanting. Basically ignore him while he's doing it.
    DarkFaery131

    Answer by DarkFaery131 at 2:31 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • Don't allow the tantrums to get him what he wants, and don't even allow the tantrums to get him attention. Stay consistent and he'll learn that tantrums won't get him what he wants. He'll learn better ways to get what he wants. Then you'll be able to have a peaceful dinner out. Until then, use a babysitter so that you and your partner can still get a nice evening out together!
    aliceinalgonac

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 2:39 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • he's only 2. maybe you'll just have to forgo the dinners out if you can't get a sitter for a while.
    sorry, but I think it's up for adults to change for the kids, not the other way around.
    I wouldn't reward the screaming, but at 2, if he wants to scream then that may just be the way it is until he outgrows it.
    it won't be this way forever.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:43 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • I'm reading Raising Spirited Children. It's really, really interesting. Goes about some of these topics differently, and also teaches us what we are like, too. I'd suggest reading this and seeing if what he says can help out. I bet it could.
    Dreamachiever

    Answer by Dreamachiever at 2:45 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • The best way to handle a "screamer," especially in a public place is to take him out of the store you are in to avoid further embarrasment or conflict from others and talk to him outside the store in a calm voice until he calms down. My children have acted up on several occasions in various places and this technique seems to work the best. You really don't want to create a scene in a store so this helps to resolve problem and avoid others who may stand and watch how you deal with your child's outbursts. If he doesn't calm down, then you can decide to go home in an exteme situation.
    CafeMochaMom1

    Answer by CafeMochaMom1 at 2:51 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • I'd highly recommend reading "The Happiest Toddler on the Block". Their method works wonders with my very opinionated toddler. Basically, whenever they throw a hissy fit about something, like wanting a cookie, you talk to them on their "level" (simple words), acknowledge what they want, and then say he/she can't have it right now, but we can go... (fill in whatever you were planning on doing anyway). It made me feel ridiculous at first, but it really helps! Kinda like this:

    *kid throwing tantrum*

    you: You MAD, you MAD cuz you want COOKIE, right?? Mad, mad, MAD! (you kind of imitate their tone, just more low key)
    *toddler nods*

    you: I know you want a cookie, cookies are good, but not right now, okay? Right now we go get groceries!

    After laughing at my finance sounding like a 2 year old, I had to admit that the tantrums would actually stop, so I started it too :)
    Anouck

    Answer by Anouck at 2:53 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • IGNORE them. Tantrums are a type of attention seeking behavior. Your best bet is to simply ignore it. Walk to another room if you must, but don't react. In public just make sure he is safely on the ground and ignore it. No eye contact at any time. Of course I do like Anouck's answer as well. My only experience is with autistic kids so her method doesn't work with mine.
    2autisticsmom

    Answer by 2autisticsmom at 7:19 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

  • Anytime one of mine would start 'screaming' they would get a swat until they stopped. I would warn them that if they didn't stop screaming they would get a swat..then if they didn't 'begin' to stop i would give them a swat.... I'd end up repeating it a couple more times and then they got the hint. So now every time they get loud i tell them to be quiet and they listen and stop throwing a tantrum or even just being loud in general.

    I will say i do help 'prevent' tantrums by trying to figure out what is going on with them before they start....usually that's all it takes and it helps them learn how to behave better and figure out their problems without getting so frustrated.
    EveMomToThree

    Answer by EveMomToThree at 11:15 PM on Jul. 20, 2010

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