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can children hate their parents?

because my 2 year old daughter is a difficult child i sometimes feel that the more i decipline her and do this do that don't do this this is wrong.... the more she gets distant o me... i sometimes feel she loves her father more than she loves me. sometimes when i change her clothes or nappy she yells at me no no i dont want u i want daddy.............this actually affects me.. i feel the more i get angry the more she'll hate me but i'm a parent i should punish and deciplen her or else she'll be just a brat that no one says no to

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:46 AM on Jul. 21, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (7)
  • My dad was my preferred parent growing up. He was the fun one, mom the strict one. Not until I had my own kid did I truely appreciate all my mom did for me. Stay the strict one, who knows how f&^%^& up I could have been had my mom not stayed on my ass. Parenting isn't about them liking you, its about doing what's best for them. They may not realize it until years later, you have the benefit of experience!
    Nyx7

    Answer by Nyx7 at 3:52 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • It might also be a stage that she is going through. My daughter is the same way. She screams that she wants daddy all the time and we are both equally nice to her.
    sherribeare

    Answer by sherribeare at 3:55 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • I agree with the above, but at the same time, I think kids are funfor the most part, and you should enjoy them. If you were doing more fun things with her, perhaps you wouldn't feel like you're always having to tell her no. Do things with her and try to spend more 1 on1 time with her and I'm sure you'll see a change in her behavior. Good luck!
    MomtoElliett

    Answer by MomtoElliett at 3:56 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • i know you're not looking for advice, but I think I can help....if you don't want help just ignore the rest, lol.....
    1. take NO out of your vocabulary for one thing.....and everything negative...learn how to say no positively....for example, instead of saying NO you can't have a chocolate bar right now, say, You can have an apple or a banana.....that gives her a choice and gives her a certain amount of control..... choices can also be used instead of getting angry and forcing a point...for example, "it's time for bed", when argued with a 2 year old can turn into an all out fight every night....let her have some control over it...."it's time for bed...do you want to wear your red pajamas or your blue ones"....and say nothing more....if she argues, just repeat her choice over and over until she gives you an answer and gets into her pajamas.
    more below....
    FXmomTo3

    Answer by FXmomTo3 at 4:00 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • the praising and hugs have to outnumber the disciplinary actions 2 to 1. If she does something nice, or without being asked, make a BIG deal about it. Tell her thank you, give her a hug and kiss and remind her how much you love her and appreciate her bieing such a big girl. Don't reward or bribe her with candy or anything though, this only backfires... lol trust me! Hugs and kisses are all the reward they need. Be sympathetic if she's upset, explain your reasons for your discipline- talk TO her not AT her. Sit down, squat to her level etc. Start now and as she gets a little older, she'll understand better and it will make a difference. Be sweet to them and it will come back.
    KariLyn84

    Answer by KariLyn84 at 4:01 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • 2....choose your battles...is it life or death that she does something a certain way, in a certain order, etc....? if not, then let it go....is it life or death if she chooses not to wear a coat when it's cold...? chances are when she gets outside, she'll start to shiver and instead of saying i told you so, you can say "maybe it would be a good decision to wear a coat now. would you like it on yet?"

    I changed both those parenting habits and literally turned our lives around.....and honestly i can take my girls out somewhere and they are better behaved than most children...it's the ones that are so badly behaved that you hear the parents constantly nagging at them, don't do that, don't go there, hey, did you hear what i said ? oy!

    Good luck to you...I hope this helps some.....it won't be instantaneous change....but it will work !
    FXmomTo3

    Answer by FXmomTo3 at 4:05 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • I also voted up KariLyn84's answer between my two answers because it's also so true and so important.
    FXmomTo3

    Answer by FXmomTo3 at 4:06 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

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