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3 Bumps

Can you create passion in a relationship?

We really don't have much passion. We're comfortable, happy and secure with eachother, but we aren't passionate. Is that something we can create, if so, how do we do that?

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Asked by allfiller at 10:50 AM on Jul. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (802 Credits)
Answers (16)
  • I dunno, but if you find out how please let me know!!!!!

    Answer by Alwaysacarnie at 10:52 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • yea why not? what about NOT planning events. if you don't have kids it's easier to do but don't plan and nice romantic dinner, or weekend getaway. you had passion before, if you didn't then yall wouldn't be least i think so. think outside the box sometimes

    Answer by MommaSyrup07 at 10:53 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • I would imagine that it depends on the character of the people involved. Some people are naturally passionate and others are more reserved. Were you two passionate when you met? if so, recreate what you did back then. I use shock value to ignite passion in SO. One time it might be by using an outfit, another time might be by being naked when he walks in the door. Then again another time might be with props sitting by the bed to get his imagination stirred up. I have the sub role with SO but before him I was more of a dom and would surprise my date by throwing them on the bed and pinning them down then straddle them and ravish them. Surprise attacks work well!

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:54 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • in a long term relationship/marriage passion waxes and wanes. life's issues and stresses etc all contribute to this. you can do things to help encourage it more like having date nights and spending time with eachother

    Answer by sati769leigh at 11:03 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • I am naturally passionate and he is more reserved...

    Comment by allfiller (original poster) at 11:23 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • You know, I brought this up to my DH the other day - "Babe, I feel like we're comfortable. I feel like there's no passion or spontaneity, and we need that. It's important in a marriage." He took me out to dinner and we did the nasty in the car on the side of the road (I'm sorry if that's TMI). Since then, it's like a wall came down. We're more touchy-feely. We want to kiss and love each other. We have chased each other around the house. All sorts of fun, different stuff. :)

    Sometimes all it takes is a talk, or one little action, to get the ball rolling. Know what I mean?

    Answer by WomanWitty at 11:53 AM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • Yes I believe you can. It may be as simple as "fake it till you make it" kind of thing. Making a effect to purposely be passionate until it is habit or natural.

    I think it is just too easy to get in the rut of the day to day and then a month later you are like what the heck happened or didn't ;)

    Answer by pjacademy at 12:53 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • If you fake passion, it will become real. You can fake anything in a marriage to make it real again. That is how my grandparents stayed married for 60 years and counting, my parents stayed married 40 years and counting.. and DH and I are staying married 10 years and counting...

    Answer by 3gifts.from.god at 1:07 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • make a dat night once a month we do even after 33 years

    Answer by butterflysmom at 1:25 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • Get naked! lol JK! sorta. Try having a night out without planning anything in advance (probably best to get an overnight sitter if possible/necessary).

    I know this is going to sound cheesy but it's fun. Before you go to dinner write out the list of restaurants in town on a notepad. Get ready, get in the car, and then have the passenger close their eyes and point to the page. Go wherever your finger landed. Do this all night to decide things. For example after dinner write down things like rent a movie, go to a park, mini golfing, etc. Try to add things you have never done or don't usually do. Have the other person point with closed eyes this time.  By the time you get home you will be having so much fun that I bet you are both being touchy/feeling and end up having an amazing night. :o)


    Answer by kfroz0415 at 2:01 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

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