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What do you guys do to get your hubby to help around the house???

I have tried and tried I am almost 7 months pregnant and have no energy for anything!!! Everytime I ask him to clean it turns into a fight. He tells me today he is going to clean as he is off all day today and all day he has been sitting on his ass doing nothing...I finally lost it yell cause thats the only way to get his ass moving and then he is like "well at least its easier to get me moving then you moving? " like i am pregnant i am exhausted I work 40 hrs a week yes i work a desk job from home but its a very stressful job and after 10 hrs a day in a chair staring at a screen I ache from head to toe! Am I out of line? Is there any advice you guys can give me? we are a young couple he is 21 i am 23 he is a lazy boy and i understand that but I need help!!!

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Linda_PF

Asked by Linda_PF at 4:22 PM on Jul. 21, 2010 in Relationships

Level 9 (333 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I do a huffy puffy breath like something is heavy. Or I say this is stuck about the trash bag in the trash can and he will take it out.
    tryin2BGOOD

    Answer by tryin2BGOOD at 4:25 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • my SO sometimes has to put me in the cleaning mood LOL. we do everything together, dishes, sweep, mop, laundry :)
    Brianna-Ravae

    Answer by Brianna-Ravae at 4:25 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • i go to sleep and dream
    then i wake and real life is here once again
    fiatpax

    Answer by fiatpax at 4:26 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • I try my hardest to avoid nagging my hubby about cleaning. I'll ask him and remind him gently, but I've found that people in general never respond well when yelled at, whether they are in the right or the wrong. One way that works for me is to divide the housework in a way that he can tell I'm not just putting it all on him. I'll say, "I'll get the dishes if you do the laundry." Being pregnant gives you more mobility with this. You could say, "I'll wipe down the counters if you vacuum. I'd vacuum but I just get so worn out from doing the whole house now that I'm pregnant."

    Also be sure to show your gratefulness when he does and thank him for being willing to do it BEFORE he does it. Then he might feel guilty if he forgets instead of just mad at you for getting onto him.
    mickstinator

    Answer by mickstinator at 4:32 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • i must be lucky. all i have to do is not clean and he will do it. he takes care of laundry most times and i do the kitchen. he doesnt like the house to be messy so he will clean it if it needs it.
    jennifer588

    Answer by jennifer588 at 4:34 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • My DH is lazy and doesn't do anything if I ask. The only way I can get him to help out is if I clean the entire house and tell him to keep it that way while I am at work. I do the house M-F and he does it on the weekends while I work.
    ashisamom

    Answer by ashisamom at 4:41 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • The answer is in his age. Men don't mature until they're 147.
    Sorry. Um... drug him?
    Wait, no... I've got to have a serious and legal response here somewhere...
    Oh, here it is... GO AWAY. Seriously. plan a weekend away (stay at your parents or whatever, it doesn't matter). Let him see what it takes to get the housework done. Have your doc put you on temp bedrest. WHatever it takes. The main issue with men who don't help is that they see housework as A) womens work (the nutheads) or B) so easy anyone can do it. And they don't get why we complain because it "seems" so easy. They can ASSume that, having never had to actually DO anything. My husband was the same way. I got 2 jobs and left the kids with him. That lasted about 2 weeks before he was bitching & moaning that he needed help at home. The wuss :)
    emhain

    Answer by emhain at 4:48 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

  • Listen, it doesn't matter if you're a SAHM (or soon to be) or if you work out of town .. You live in a home with your partner .. That means that you both have 50% responsibility in the home. You BOTH clean, you BOTH pick up after yourselves, you BOTH do laundry, you BOTH take out the trash. This "You're a SAHM you should do it all." or "I work I shouldn't have to." is BS. Pure BS. You need to let him know that the more you balance each other out in taking care of and keeping up the home the happier you'll both be. That means less fighting, less arguing, less finger pointing, because you'll both be doing what you're supposed to.

    Men do not understand what a women goes through while pregnant, so they cannot comprehend how exhausting and painful it can actually be. It's impossble for them to truely understand as they'll never experience it. So take that into mind.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 4:50 PM on Jul. 21, 2010

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