Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I wanna know more about adoption?

Looking for anyone who has adopted a child or givne one up for adoption. How did it work How do you feel about it? Was it open or closed?

Answer Question

Asked by babygirl333333 at 12:38 AM on Oct. 2, 2008 in Adoption

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I gave one up. It didn't work out as planned, my open adoption is starting to close. Many birthmothers I know who were involved in "open adoptions" had them close on them. Can I ask why you'd like to hear more?

    Answer by lillie023 at 1:12 AM on Oct. 2, 2008

  • Adoption is amazing!!! I am unable to carry a full-term pregnancy, and wanted children so badly. We jumped right into adoption.... both of my beautiful girls are adopted, and we were lucky to get biological sisters. We got our oldest at 7 months, and our youngest at 5 months. They are such a blessing to my family!!! Our situation was a bit different than most because our girls were in the foster care system, and their birthmother did not have many choices. We still stay in contact with her (on occasion- like I said, our case is much different than most), and we love her very much! OUr girls know they were blessed to have both a tummy mommy and a forever mommy. :) Good luck!

    Answer by adoptivemommy24 at 1:17 AM on Oct. 2, 2008

  • OH... I meant to ask, are you looking into adopting a child? Or placing a child for adoption? I have great resources for both. :) I would be glad to be of any service possible.

    Answer by adoptivemommy24 at 1:18 AM on Oct. 2, 2008

  • We adopted our daughter, bringing her home when she was 3 months old. This was after suffering through over 7 years of fertility testing and treatments. We went through an agency and have an open adoption. We had some problems at first because of extended birth-family (there's some history there, but no room for that on here), but we are working through that with the BMom. Even with our history of the problems, we are very happy with our adoption. Adoption was truly a blessing for our family and we are thankful every day for it!!

    Answer by AllAboutKeeley at 7:10 AM on Oct. 2, 2008

  • I put my 2nd child for adoption. She is 16 now. At the time I thought it was the best thing. We had an agreement for pictures & letters once or twice a year. For the past 6 years I have barely recieved any information or new pictures. I went for 4 yrs with nothing, then got a letter & 4 pictures. for the past year & half I get nothing again even though I have written numerous times. Please be advised that "open" adoption is at the descretion of the adopting parents. They can decide on a whim to cut you off & then you are left to wonder. The child could possibley grow up not knowing a thing about you or even if they are adopted. It happens. You have no control over it. Just know this: you will miss that baby everyday of your life.

    Answer by lisa89j at 11:24 AM on Oct. 2, 2008

  • I have 2 daughters who were adopted at birth. We had to take classes, complete a homestudy by a social worker, and create a profile about ourselves. One of our daughter's birthmother picked us from a profilebook, and one of our daughter's mother picked us from a 6-page application about ourselves. We talked to them on the phone and met in person before they picked us to adopt their children. We talk on the phone, email, and send updates (pictures and letters) to the birthmother and birthfather. We have had visits also.
    It has been a wonderful experience for us. I know that both of the mothers are still glad that they placed but they both had good counseling and really examined their options. I don't know if that will change. We also had long conversations with them about what they wanted in terms of openness and what we wanted.

    Answer by luckyshamrock at 3:06 PM on Oct. 2, 2008

  • Adoption is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. I placed my daughter with complete strangers. In 2003, my daughter found me. After two month of reunion, my daughter pulled back from me. I guess that you could say that now my daughter and I are strangers.

    Answer by Foundatlast at 5:20 PM on Oct. 2, 2008

  • I placed my first son at birth, the first few years were okay for me as I tried to get on with life. However I was never quite the same. The thing about adoption is there are no guarantee's, adoptive families go through the same life circumstances as everyone else - divorce, financial hardship, drug/alcohol abuse, child abuse or one is really perfect. My adoption was semi-open. We exchanged letters and pictures a couple times a year, until my son turned 12 and then they just stopped talking to me. It's been 4 years since I've received an update or any pictures, I continue to write however, until this summer when my last letter came back saying forwarding expired, apparently they moved and still haven't called or written to tell me. I miss him every day, I wish sometimes that I could go back and change time. My life is not better without my son - my life is simply differen :(

    Answer by blessedwboysx3 at 10:35 AM on Oct. 3, 2008

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.