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when your teenager comes home

Do they say "hi" and are friendly? then go about doing whatever they need to do?

Or walk in the door and go about their business like they are the only one's home?

I have a 17 yr old daughter...when she comes home she does not say "hi" to anybody or even out loud as she walks in...she just walks in and does whatever she needs to do for herself.
she doesn't say anything unless she is spoken to first...she is just in her own world..
it drives me nuts because there is no relationship, she just pushes away.
She doesn't have her license because she isn't pushing for it, she doesn't push for anything, just keeps to herself.
What is normal and what isn't?
I try to talk to her, she just says" okay" and that's all....
I'm just hoping she changes soon, I just see don't see the joy anymore...


Asked by Anonymous at 4:12 PM on Jul. 22, 2010 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • Ahhh posts like these make me scared of the teenage years... :-( I remember I would get in trouble as a teen if I walked in and ignored my parents. It just wasn't acceptable. I'm not close to my parents now though so I'm not sure if that was good. I would just always be the first to say "hi" and smile if I was you.

    Answer by mommymela87 at 4:34 PM on Jul. 22, 2010

  • Say hi no matter what mood she's in. Keep it casual and don't pressure her to respond. Do you do things with her? Shopping.......manicures, etc? Maybe she needs some one on one time with you to keep connected. Don't give up!! Good luck!

    Answer by elizabr at 4:15 PM on Jul. 22, 2010

  • Well, mine is 14, but, I do get a hi. And he will talk with me if I am talking.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 4:15 PM on Jul. 22, 2010

  • keep trying to initiate converstation - at that age I wasn't talking because I was drinking and hungover all the time and didn't want my mom to see that from talking to me so I came it and out without saying much -

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 4:18 PM on Jul. 22, 2010

  • partly typical but she sounds depressed.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 4:18 PM on Jul. 22, 2010

  • It may be common but that doesn't mean its normal or desirable. I suggest trying to reach out to her in some major ways. Try to get her involved in doing some things with you that she is interested in.

    I had 3 sons and homeschooled so my situation was different. I'm sorry I can't be of more help. It must be really painful. This is most likely a phase that will pass.

    Have you seen the movie Life As A House. It's about a teen boy and his parent renewing their relationship with him. It's not the same situation at all but it popped in my head when I read your question. You might like watching it (with a box of Kleenex).


    Answer by Gailll at 4:21 PM on Jul. 22, 2010

  • My three kids were usually cheerful. They walked home from the school bus,said HI and usually asked for a snack. Then I asked if they needed help with homework. Etc. And when they were in high school, they had after school activities such as Language (French) club or soccer, tennis. Then after that, they came home, said Hi, cheerfully and we had dinner. When my son was a senior and in love with the first time, he used to put a U2 CD in , lie on the family room couch and listen and he was sort of moody. LOL. Love will do that to ya,I guess.
    BUT that was in the 1980's , simpler times, and I guess families have changed since then and have more "issues" now??? I don't know.....

    Answer by gertie41 at 4:31 PM on Jul. 22, 2010

  • well, mine is 14 and i do get a "hi" out of him and then he goes about his business but if he's in a bad mood, i also get the attitude which doesn't sit well with me and he knows it but even though he's in a bad mood, i can get him to atleast calm down enough so he can tell me whats wrong.

    Answer by shorty13417 at 4:57 PM on Jul. 22, 2010

  • She sounds depressed. I would get her evaluated.

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:22 PM on Jul. 22, 2010