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Flaky friend, would YOU be mad?

OKay so I have been friends with this girl since we were in HS. She was at the birth of my oldest son. She blips in and out of my life for the last five years only to come back. She was due August 13th, she has explained (and was coming over every week) that she was really nervous because she is a first time mom and I have done this a few times myself and that she wanted some help from me and I told her that I would do anything I could to help her out. I do love this girl to death, but I hate how flaky she is. So fast foward to last friday, I get a text message from her telling me that it's nothing dangerous but that she is having a c-section friday (as in yesterday) so I call and text her constantly to find out what is going on and she never calls, never texts me in a whole week. I am close to just dropping her because of this pattern. I make time for her, I don't understand why she would ask for my help and then ignore me.


Asked by Anonymous at 9:04 PM on Jul. 24, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • I would definately let her know how you feel. And tell her it wont be tolerated anymore, either your friends or your not. But that your not just going to be there when its convient for her. Also, I would never just give up on her without closure... that would be no different then what shes doing to you. I can totally understand why your upset though and feel like she at least owes you a phone call. I would be the same way.

    Answer by cthrush82 at 9:53 PM on Jul. 24, 2010

  • Sorry but I don't see why she needs to make you the center of her universe. She has a life. She may have problems in her pregnancy and all you think about is you? That's messed up.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:12 PM on Jul. 24, 2010

  • I would try being up front and honest with her about how her absences make you feel. Don't be passive aggressive about this, she might not even realize she's done anything to offend you. Tell her that if she keeps making this a habit..she can no longer expect for you to be there for her and be a friend. If you just walk away without explaining..then she might not ever come to realize why her friendships keep going by the way side.

    Answer by Heathercurlz at 9:10 PM on Jul. 24, 2010

  • I have a friend like that its hard to be friends with people who can't remember.

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 9:11 PM on Jul. 24, 2010

  • This is me, I just hate that I don't even know what hospital she is at and it was so unplanned for her to go so early. This is how she has always been too. I can't be too awful, I mean she did just have a baby yesterday....ugh. I kind of wish that she would just go away and stay away.

    The thing that worries me the most is that she was due August 13th, but she said it was nothing dangerous, so why else would they c-section so early? I mean this is like 3 weeks early. I just hope everything is okay.

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 9:15 PM on Jul. 24, 2010

  • Anon, didn't you read this? She asked for MY help and I was more then willing to help out. She has always done this, so I am not sure why this should surprise me. I make time for her (I have three boys myself!) and I personally don't think that you should drop that kind of message in a freaking text of all things and then not answer your phone or a text to let people know that you are ok.

    Answer by MamaRoberts at 9:17 PM on Jul. 24, 2010

  • well... i have a couple friends that i've had for many years that have come and gone in my life throughout the years due to a variety of circumstances. i love them dearly and when they're gone i miss them, but when they're back it's like no time lost. just try to give the support you are willing and able to give and stop making it all about you. this reminds me of a question that was posted the other day here about people getting their panties all in a bunch because they are wanting to answer a question that was deleted. my response to that was it's not about me (or the responder). be careful of wanting to control situations just because you are involved in some way. just try to love with an open mind and heart.

    Answer by figaro8895 at 11:40 PM on Jul. 24, 2010

  • I agree with pp.

    Answer by MomtoElliett at 2:53 AM on Jul. 25, 2010