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5 Bumps

Please help i need advice

My dd father and i broke up 3 months ago and he refuses to let me move on he has people follow me and he keeps threating me and any male i hang out with. My dd ask for him all the time he will go 9 day without calling and then call and my dd get very sad after she is only 2 but after their talk all she wants to do is lay down and watch tv. If she hurts herself she will hit whatever it is and say stupid daddy. I not sure why but she is very smart for her age and i no she understands daddy is not here. I've tried multiple times to have him watch her and he is more into what im doing and going through all my stuff when im at work. Well today i finally got him to come see her as soon as i got home he left and i notice one of my cell phones were gone the cell phone had all the recordings of him threating me and my male friends i dont know what to do. I want a restraining order and custody but now i have no proof that he does this.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:14 AM on Jul. 25, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • Maybe it's time to go ahead and try to get that restraining order. You can always use your "male" friends as witnesses. Also have you thought about moving to another city?
    itsallabtthem84

    Answer by itsallabtthem84 at 1:56 AM on Jul. 25, 2010

  • i agree with the above.
    MomtoElliett

    Answer by MomtoElliett at 2:30 AM on Jul. 25, 2010

  • Yeah, I'd definitely move. It's not like he's a prominent positive figure in her life and he is actually hurting her. He's more concerned w/ u than her.
    DaGoodLife

    Answer by DaGoodLife at 7:53 AM on Jul. 25, 2010

  • just tell them everything you can. file a police report about the stolen cell phone. find some play therapy/counseling for your daughter. document... even if it's just you that knows what's going on if you have a notebook with dates, times, facts of what is going on that's helpful. call the police if actual threats are made toward you or men. have the men who are comfortable doing so provide information as well. good luck. glad you are sorta rid of that jerk.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 10:21 AM on Jul. 25, 2010

  • You don't HAVE to have the recordings to file a restraining order. Like the others have said, tell them everything, take people with you who will corroborate your story. And you don't have to let him talk to your daughter. Yeah, he's the father, but that doesn't entitle him to torture the girl!
    Live4HerSmile

    Answer by Live4HerSmile at 2:04 PM on Jul. 25, 2010

  • If i move he will follow. I work and im scared if i leave her anywhere but with a family member he will take her and if this happens there is nothing i can do until a court date. I just feel like anything i try im gonna be haunted by. He says that if i take him to court that not the court or the cops will keep him from her. And with having my friends help hes threating them he told one that if he continues to talk to me his gonna kill him infront of his son. But i feel if i dont do anything he'll just keep doing it and i will never beable to move on with my life.
    kahlynsmommy1

    Answer by kahlynsmommy1 at 2:49 PM on Jul. 25, 2010

  • You DO NOT need the recording to get a restraining order. Go down to the police station and file for one ASAP. And if he is have a negative impact on your daughter move and just dont tell any one where you are going. He cant follow you if he dont know where you are!
    LiLJeni

    Answer by LiLJeni at 6:29 PM on Jul. 25, 2010

  • Just look at your daughter and know what you need to do. Her father is a bad influence on her. She is already picking up his violent tendancies. You need to take everything this man is doing very seriously. You need to do everything that you can to establish that this man is stalking you, tormenting you and may in fact try to hurt or kill you. I am very concerned for your safety. At this point yes, get a restraining order and any other order you can. I would also move and do not tell anyone where you move to. As hard as this may be it is for you and your daughters own protection, and may very well save you or her life.If he is obsessed with you he may try to hurt her to get to you. I would also take some defence classes. You need to feel that you can protect yourself if it comes down to it. Do what you have to to protect yourself and your daughter and do it now.
    Pudminkal

    Answer by Pudminkal at 7:49 PM on Jul. 25, 2010

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