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should I call the other mom

my husband and daughter don't get along.He is mean and she talks back. she spends most of her time at her boyfriend's house including staying over. my husband feels she is shacking up but when she is home he is not nice to her.boyfriend's mom lets her stay, in separate rooms so they say.should I call the mom and try to get her on board to get daughter to be home more? daughter 18 I wanted a girl ( she has 2 older brothers) and I am very sad that she is not happy in her own house.She wants to Quit college and get full time job and move in with him. I think she would meet new people going away to school and get a different perspective . I want her to be able to support herself. Any ideas?

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Asked by Anonymous at 11:39 PM on Jul. 26, 2010 in Adult Children (18+)

Answers (15)
  • is this your step daughter? im confused!

    Answer by DeeMarie87 at 11:43 PM on Jul. 26, 2010

  • She is an adult and if she wants to move out of your house their is nothing you can do. The best thing is to be supportive and be there when she needs it. She has to learn through her own mistakes.

    Answer by JeremysMom at 11:44 PM on Jul. 26, 2010

  • not stepmom her mom. I know she is an adult but I don't want to see her crash and burn. I don't want her going there because her dad doesn't like it.

    Answer by flowki at 11:53 PM on Jul. 26, 2010

  • I'm sorry, I have a friend who went through this but, I have to agree with JeremysMom, and evetuallty my friend had to realize this too.

    Answer by IAmFreeToDance at 11:54 PM on Jul. 26, 2010

  • huh? i asked if it was your step daughter? if ur her real mom what other mom are u talkin about?

    Answer by DeeMarie87 at 11:55 PM on Jul. 26, 2010

  • boyfriend's mom

    Answer by flowki at 11:57 PM on Jul. 26, 2010

  • Even though her and her dad fight, you need to build a relationship with her. Take her out and spend some one on one time with her. Right now there's nothing you can really do except give her advice (but don't over do it) and be there for her. She may not make the choices you hope she does, but be there to support her no matter what- good luck!!

    Answer by skittles1108 at 11:57 PM on Jul. 26, 2010

  • iamfreetodance how did it end up for your friend's child?

    Answer by flowki at 11:58 PM on Jul. 26, 2010

  • Her being 18 makes her an adult. So she is old enough to make her own choices. Why is your husband mean to her? Is this his own child or step child? To be honest with you if my father or even step father was mean to me I wouldn't want to come home either. Maybe your husband should work on being nicer to her and maybe she will want to come home more. Wanting her to go away to collage isn't going to fix anything. It's good that you want her to make something of herself but you can't force her to do it. Good luck

    Answer by lil_Army_Wife05 at 12:12 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • If your daughter doesn't want to stay at home, I can see why. You need to talk to your husband about being so hard on her. She is eighteen and considered an adult. She probably wants to work so she can get out of the house sooner. I believe she thinks this is more important than going to college. Sit down and talk to her, and ask her why she isn't there so much, (although I think you already know why.) What would you do if she said, "Who would you choose, him or me?" I've been through this, I chose my daughter.

    Answer by amessageofhope at 12:49 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

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