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Are you sick of hearing how overprotective you are from your teen?

This has been an issue every time my DD has a boyfriend, which has been since she was 14, this is the 2nd one. Then, it was only getting together at our house, or on occasion with a big group at the movies. Now, at 16, we have given her more options as she has gotten older, but still encourage group dates. She's gone to parties, bonfires, the mall, swimming here...& we did let her go one on one to the movies (make-out time!) and to his house, when his Mom was home, but she was in his room. Our rules are no bedrooms, no parks alone, etc.. (I have since found out his Mom picks random times to get drunk, but not when DD is there) My DH & I see that they are increasingly wanting to be alone and we are both discouraging it. She is acting like the other options are not enough & that we are treating her like she is 11. I'm sick of hearing about it. My husband says they need to come up with better ideas for hanging out, but what?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:01 AM on Jul. 27, 2010 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (8)
  • Do you trust your daughter?? At some point you HAVE to trust that your daughter will do the right thing and will know to say no.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 7:26 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • I agree with first poster!
    hot-mama86

    Answer by hot-mama86 at 7:42 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • I don't have a teen. But I was one recently. lol.

    I don't think you're being overprotective. My aunt let me have boys in my room and I wish she didn't(I lost my virginity at 17 and it's my biggest regret). She let me go out unsupervised all the time(I started drinking at 14). I should have made better choices, absolutely. But if she had been there and paying attention to the things that were going on, I wouldn't have been so wild. Thank goodness I found a church, settled down and met my husband. :]
    acurran88

    Answer by acurran88 at 7:43 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • Let me say that BEING a teen and RAISING teens it TOTALLY DIFFERENT!
    I've raised twin boys to the age of 20 and they are both virgins with one getting married on Saturday. I have a 15 yr old daughter and a 13 yr old son - both virgins. With my daughter - I do trust her. I also know that I wouldn't allow her to go to a home I'm not comfortable with her going to, but the movies - that's a TRUST thing - you have to trust that your daughter will do the right thing because you have raised her right.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 8:13 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • She'll thank you for being over protective when she has her own teenager! Stick to your guns. It's not a poularity contest. I wish my parents had been more involved. I ended up pregnant at 16 and had some really rough years after that. I wish I they had given me guidance about birth cntrol too. Dr. Phil supposedly has some good books dealing with this. And I'm sure there are others. GL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:03 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • No, because I work differently than many other parents of teens commonly do, I actually TRUST my teens and let them know if they want to keep their privileges and freedoms and trust then they won't BREAK it. IF they break it then it will be a long road to slowly EARN it back again. This has worked very well for our 5.
    Momof5Teens67

    Answer by Momof5Teens67 at 9:42 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • Yes,

    Our job is to guide them, teach them, and let them learn. My daughter is 14 and she is boy crazy. I have told her about boys, sex, and drugs. I don't want her to have sex, but she is aware of her responsibity of taking care of her self if she does. I don't like the idea of telling a 14 year old about STD's, Protection and pregnancy but if I don't who will. How will she know what she is getting herself into.

    We can do everything as a parent love them, teach them, and show them what the right way to us is. A kid will be a kid though, and they need to learn on there own. We must pray they choose the right path... :) Good luck!!!!
    KFree907

    Answer by KFree907 at 9:50 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • I just say, you're welcome...my being strict is why you aren't knocked up, in jail or rehab! I guess I did my job now didn't I? They just roll their eyes and move on.
    salexander

    Answer by salexander at 10:36 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

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