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Do you ever think divorce(s) are just a copout for the males, and ........

Doesn't it get them off the hook for so much instead of just working on the relationship? I always see them as so weak when they pounce on the female with the paper, saying stuff to stir her up, and not even nice to her. If they really were worth staying with wouldn't they just try to use the love that they are so good with and kindness to have you around and not be so angry and aggitated seeing how they are always the one creating it. "acting so proud, mighty, stoic, and dangerous, and not caring ..... almost ever. oh,, and sloppy.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:02 AM on Jul. 27, 2010 in Health

Answers (9)
  • For the males? I see more women saying they want a divorce and they are leaving their husband and taking the children.
    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 9:10 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • I don't think anyone wins in a divorce or has it easier or is one sided. Both sides go through a lot of stress, hurt feelings, and turmoil. In the end, usually the woman gets the kids and the man loses half their stuff and has to pay a chunk of money plus child support. I think people need to think before they get married, go into it knowing it takes a ton of work on both sides, and unless you are getting beat... you are in it for the long haul. In your case maybe it feels like he is just taking an easy way out, but for some reason he doesn't feel it is worth the fight to try and stay in it and try and make it work.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:19 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • Males? Women do it too.
    SuperrMommyy

    Answer by SuperrMommyy at 9:21 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • My DH tried counseling with his ex. He said all she did was lie and make him look like the bad guy in the relationship, when she cheated on him (with 2 guys that we know of!). We've hit some rough spots where I have thought about divorce, but we've managed to work through them. I don't think it's an easy out for the man, because usually they are the ones to get screwed in a divorce. I know mine did with his ex! Having me back him and being there to push him, has helped with getting more visitation and such.
    JGRIMMER

    Answer by JGRIMMER at 9:26 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • I think that there are a lot of men and women both that use divorce as a cop out. Not everyone who gets divorced though, some get a divorce because their partner has abandoned the marriage, and some because there truly is no way to salvage it or it's a dangerous / unhealthy situation that they shouldn't stay in.

    But I do think that some - of both genders - do this.

    I sort of suspect from your question that this is something that's happening to you, that your husband is doing. If so, I'm really sorry, and I hope that, one way or another, things work out for you :-(
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 9:26 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • ACTUALLY... it is a fact that much more women leave the man they are with than vice versa. I guess it is a "cop-out" for some people... but usually no.
    eastcoastmama11

    Answer by eastcoastmama11 at 10:04 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • I think that most divorces occur because one or both are too lazy to invest the necessary time and energy to make a good marriage. Long, happy marriages don't just happen by magic, love is not enough.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:04 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • It can be a cop out for women as well. Men aren't the only ones who don't want to work for the relationship. I don't know if you have some issues with men, but you really are seeing this as a one sided issue. It's BOTH people in the relationship that make it fail.
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 10:15 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • I think that more people use divorce for cop-out, period. Not only men. There are women out there that get married only to get pregnant so they can divorce the guy and try to collect money. It's a two-way street.
    nicolemstacy

    Answer by nicolemstacy at 10:39 AM on Jul. 27, 2010

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