Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

16 Bumps

experiencing physical abuse in my relationship adult content

im 20 years old. i live with my boyfriend and our son. hes 19. my son is 2. it seems like almost everytime we argue if i get smart with him he'll push me down {hard} push my head back ,today he slapped me 3 times because i got "smart" with him. and hes doing this in front of our son.which really upsets me. i keep telling him to stop putting his hands on me but he says comments like " you act like it really hurts, or you act like im punching you or something. i dont think its any better just because he doesnt punch me. the only reason i put up with this is because i need his help paying the rent and bills. and the car to get to work. i could move back in with my mom but it would just prove her right that hes abusive and i couldnt make it on my own.plus my dad might kill him if he finds out my bf has been slapping me plus its soo embarrasing to me if my family finds out. giv advice stories and opinions to help he also controls $

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:32 PM on Jul. 27, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (41)
  • run mama run. as fast and far as you can. It will be hard and you will feel hopeless, but you will get through. There is help, I wish I knew where to help you find it. Do you have a relative to stay with? a shelter or something?
    shesahophead

    Answer by shesahophead at 6:34 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • run! Swallow your pride. You don't want your son to grow up thinking it is OK, do you? And what happens if/when he starts hitting your son?
    Ashlynnsmommy07

    Answer by Ashlynnsmommy07 at 6:38 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • I think you need to get out of there hun if only for your sons sake you dont him growing up thinking its acceptable behaviour to abuse your partner. I'm sure your parents will be supportive if you tell them how you feel. I know it would be a very hard thing to go back home but it might be the best thing in the long run.
    MummaMj

    Answer by MummaMj at 6:40 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • Okay you need to go it does not get any better run he is hitting you because he feels he can run . Do not be afraid to seek help from your family if they are there take it most women do not have help. GL Momma
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 6:45 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • Run away from him. I had a boyfriend that was mentally and physically abusive. He called me a whore and a slut all the time. He tried turning my friends anf dad against me. He tried pushing me down stairs and he pushed me into walls. One day we were out driving and he grabbed my steering wheel and jerked it hard, almost running s off the road at 55mph. I ended it, but he continued harassing me. I agree with seeing about staying at a womans shelter or stay with relatives or a friend. Get out.
    PoisonousBlonde

    Answer by PoisonousBlonde at 7:03 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • Your son will learn that it's OK to abuse someone. Please don't let this continue. You deserve more than this. Be good to yourself and make a change. If you go home, if you have an OK relationship with your mom, talk to her and acknowledge he is abusive and ask for her love and support. Or is there a good friend you can go to? Please think of all your options and trust you are doing what's right for you and your son.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 7:28 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • get out. there are places that can help you get your life back on track. if he thinks it is ok to hurt you he might hurt your son. if your can't get out for you get out for him.
    happy-go-lucky

    Answer by happy-go-lucky at 7:33 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • hugsSo pride might be keeping you from going to a safe place? Darlin' I'm a mom of adult daughters and if they ever experienced what you are going through I'd expect them to come to me. I'm sure your mom feels the same. We want our children safe. I know you want your child safe. Your mom wants you safe. I am from an abusive marriage and I left. My family hated him but they supported me so I could take care of myself and my children on my own. My dad wanted to kill my x too but he didn't. Please stay safe. Don't be treated like this and don't let your child live in an atmosphere like that.

    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:40 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • I am much older than you and that pride you have of not wanting your mom to be right, will only get you hurt. Your family loves you and they know you want to make your own decision on your mate, but no way in heck do they want to see you and their grandchild hurt. Go home to your parents or to a safe shelter, i promise you they will keep you and your baby safe. It's not acceptable what this punk is doin to you. Dn't worry about the bills or anything else but you and the babies safety, nothing else matters but you being safe. Don't let him manipulate you into thinking you can't take his baby, cuz any judge or police will tell that if he hits you, your baby will be next. They wouldn't want you to have the baby around that abuser.Pleeease get out dear. I moved in with my parents about 3 times thru my life to be safe and moved out when things got better for me. and I'm 46. Its ok to move back.they wont judge you.
    mrs2323

    Answer by mrs2323 at 8:24 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • You'd rather be abused than admit that you family was ight about him being abusive? One of my best friends was killed by her abusive husband. It started out w pushing, escalated to hitting, then he STABBED her over 50 times. Get out for you poor childs sake.
    JackieGirl007

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 8:40 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.