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3 Bumps

i told him I regret getting married cause he's not a good step father...

I played it off at first as him never being a dad (was only 21 when we got together) and my son was 4. he is now 9. He says things that to me would lower a childs self esteem.He swears a lot and basically acts like my son is stupid. He doesn't come out and say it but the tone he uses and his phrasing such as "come on use your brain duh". I feel like I should have chosen someone better for my son.his real dad is not around and I do have a 2yt old with my husband.We talk about it and he admits he needs to change the way he says things. I've suggested parenting classes but "I dont need them, I'll change" and he does not seem to get the impact of what we say has on a child. So frustrated, I dont know if I should give up on my marriage due to this. He is a good dad to our daughter and never is abusive, except during these circumstances. What would you do? I do not have the income to "just leave".

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:31 PM on Jul. 27, 2010 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • well you have to do what's best for your children. if you ask him to change and he doesn't then the best thing to do is leave. alot of mothers don't have the income to leave but it's better than your child having low self esteem.
    xavierlogan09

    Answer by xavierlogan09 at 10:37 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • Stick it out. Instead of criticizing, restate his sentences in a nicer way. Help him learn, instead of always being negative. You can be a powerful influence for change in him if you set your mind to it and go about it in the right way. He knows he has the problem, and you can be the one to help him overcome it. Your children need their daddy, and this can and will get better with the right kind of help from you.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 10:39 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • i would have left him immediately ! i would never let my partner real dad or step dad treat my child that way . its my kids first then a guy .
    mommyof2chasmin

    Answer by mommyof2chasmin at 10:49 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

  • so are you saying he treats the children differently?

    personally I would leave. after 5 years of that i would be gone
    MoMoFu

    Answer by MoMoFu at 10:50 PM on Jul. 27, 2010

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