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my 19 month old is a bully!!!! what can i do?

i dont know why, maybe because he has never had to share. butt he is such a bully when he gets around kids he wont share, he hits, bites, punches, its like he doesnt know how to play with kids. how do i get him to play nice. my hubby is kinda rough when they play together, so im thinking maybe he tries to play rough with them and they cant handle it like daddy can. tips on fixing this?


Asked by Anonymous at 12:47 PM on Jul. 28, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • Anon, he may be a "baby" but he also needs to learn how to interact with other children. I agree with elizabr and aliceinalgonac.. supervise play, talk to your kiddo and let him know when things are not okay, but above all he needs to have good role modeling from mom and especially dad. It's never ever too early to start teaching manners and socialization, it's not like they turn 3 and just say "Oh! I'm going to share today," it is a learned behavior. Good luck, mama :) I'm sure he's going to be just fine!

    Answer by LishaBee at 3:00 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • Both you and your husband need to model the behavior you desire in your little guy.

    Answer by aliceinalgonac at 12:50 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • Maybe give him little rewards for being gentle when you catch him doing it?

    Answer by evelynwest at 12:49 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • I have the total opposite problem.. My son is 2-1/2 and had a very sensitive personality and he gets things taken from him and he's the one getting hit, bit or pushed.. we don't know how to tell him to stand up and hit back because if/when he does hit, he's been told and put in time out for it being wrong and not nice etc.. as he never does it as a fighting back situation.. just normal aggression.. But I worry for him too because he is so scared of kids now and is SO shy when he see's them or they come towards him he almost cowers...

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 12:53 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • he's only 19 months old, is there a reason why he's being pushed into something he's not ready for?
    if he's not ready to play with other kinds why can't it wait?
    I don't know how in the world you get a kid that young to do something they clearly don't want to do.
    He is how he is, you can't change him.
    granted, in time he'll need to work with others, but I imagine that he'll get enough social skills to deal with the real world.

    why push him now? he's a baby!

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:53 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • He's still very young and does not know how to share and play with others. Most children this young play in the same area as others, but not "with " them. They need adult supervision and you can model kindness for him. But he will not know how to share until he is older and that is taught by adults. When I had play dates with friends we sat on the floor with the kids and supervised their play. We could chat and there was an adult there to make sure everyone was happy.

    Answer by elizabr at 1:57 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • Its not cute. Your son is doing what he is being taught to do.(Maybe your husband was/is a bully or was bullied when he was younger). When your son bullies, stop him immediately and tell him what he did is not nice and that is a no no. he is not to do that other children/people. Make him sit by himself, dont let him play with other children for 5 minutes. if he cries, let him cry it only a tantrum it will pass. Tell him if you see him being mean and not nice to other chlidren you will spank his hand or a little sting on his bottom and make him sit by himself. Reinforce this only spank when he does it after you have told him to stop, sit by himself etc 1 or 2 times. After a while he will understand you have to teach him when to be rough and when to play nice. Maybe daddy should do help in this area

    Answer by huntergal at 3:07 PM on Jul. 28, 2010