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My three year old has been potty trained for a few months with practically no accidents. NOT EVEN AT NIGHT. Today she had an accident while sitting in her beanbag. She knows this is not ok. I spanked her so she can realize that she needs to get to the potty. After bathing her and chaging her clothes, 45 minutes late she does the same thing. Im not for spanking my kids but she knows this isn't ok and i know she is capable of not having accidents. Am i a mean mother? I'm so frustarated.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 3:03 PM on Jul. 28, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (13)
  • Is she so engrossed that she's not realizing she's gotta go before its too late? Start asking her every 10 mins or so when you know its around that time if she has to pee. Turn off whatever she's watching or have her put down whatever she's doing & think about whether or not she has to go.

    Answer by Nyx7 at 3:04 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • You're not mean... I've spanked over the potty training issue... I felt like a turd afterwards but it just gets SO aggrivating!

    Answer by Memigen at 3:05 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • don't spank over accidents. It's not encouraged to discipline over accidents in the beginning, and it should also applies further down the road.

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 3:05 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • She might have a UTI, this causes all kinds of issues in people. including it is known to create emotional/psyche issues in the elderly. Health issues such as temp and tummy pains can also occur after it has gone untreated. Or it could be attention seeking behavior.

    Answer by EyeofOdin at 3:05 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • Sweetheart apparently the spanking did not work, you are not mean just clueless as what to do and frustrated. Give her a time out or take away something, she is old enough to understand.

    Answer by older at 3:06 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • and lemme add, no you're not a bad mom! :)
    I am very anti-spanking, yet yesterday I spanked my son for the first time ever. I've been under a ton of stress and he hit my limit. For me, this was a lesson learned...I will never do it again.

    Answer by Owl_Feather at 3:07 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • I have to disagree that three is old enough to never have mistakes again. You never know which child will be potty trained before two and which one still will wear pull ups at night at five. When potty training you should never punish a child for accidents, even if you feel it's intentional. They are most certainly don't doing it to be malicious. Typically it's because they are too busy to realize they have to go potty or they just didn't recognize the cue. Sometimes it's from an infection, sometimes it's because they are scared or confused. It's very common for children to go back and forth between milestones. When a child who is potty trained is working on another milestone sometimes they'll slip back a little. Help her to be more aware of her body by asknig her if she needs to go, usually every 30 mins works. Before she starts playing, goes somewhere, takes a nap etc.. she should try to go.

    Answer by Cassarah at 3:10 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • Regression occur in ALL kids. Do not spank her, just take her in to the bathroom and explain again and help her clean herself. She may also have a medical issue causing it.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 3:10 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • you definatly should not be spanking for her using the bathroom. that causes serious issues later on in life like self control issues and self esteem issues, and feeling ashamed of ones self.

    kids have accidents. you dont physically harm your little innocent child because she didnt make it to the bathroom. i mean, come on. thats just mean.

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 3:19 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

  • I think spanking her over it was wrong. Something could be very wrong like a UTI and it could be something she couldn't control and all you did was make her feel bad for something she may not be able to control. Also this does happen alot in children who are potty trained. Really, it is nothing to spank them over. I wouldn't say your a mean mother but I think you might want to take a step back and try to figure out what maybe wrong with her. encourage her to use the bathroom even if that mean you have to ask her every 5 minutes. If she keeps doing it you may want to call her pedi...

    Answer by lil_Army_Wife05 at 9:58 PM on Jul. 28, 2010

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