He played music, we drank, we dressed in fantasy clothes, and had a large canopy bed with vails everywhere! God I miss him and wish to play! Now I am with someone who thinks BDSM is all about hitting. He likes to leave bruises, but I want the fantasy.
Mylimits aren't respected. There is no safe word.
Is it worth leaving him to find the fantasy?
Asked by Anonymous at 1:51 AM on Jul. 29, 2010 in Relationships
Answer by Sara.Robyson at 1:54 AM on Jul. 29, 2010
Answer by sailorwifenmom at 1:59 AM on Jul. 29, 2010
Answer by pixie_trix at 2:01 AM on Jul. 29, 2010
BDSM should never be used as an excuse for physical abuse. You said your limits are not respected. That is abuse. You said there is no safe word. That is dangerous. He wants to hit and you want the fantasy. Both of you are not compatible in what BDSM is to each of you. It's always worth leaving abuse.
You have a say in this. And it starts with your feet. You can leave. That is inviolable law.
I've been involved with BDSM for many years. Let me tell you, a strong sub is one who stands up for herself and is one who knows the difference between an abuser and play. Those are always hard lessons to learn. If you need someone to talk to, drop me a line. Good Luck.
Answer by isabellalecour at 8:37 AM on Jul. 29, 2010
Answer by Ricanmami1 at 11:51 AM on Jul. 29, 2010
Answer by 2boysnaprincess at 11:51 AM on Jul. 29, 2010