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What should I do??? READ ME!!!

I just started back talking to this old guy I like. We had stopped talking because he did not want a relationship. We just finally started back talking and the first night we saw eachother he was trying to have sex with me, but I remenber last time he said No because he did not want to hurt me. Is he just wanting sex or does he now want a relationship. He told me he wants to see where this goes and I should just relax. What do you all think? Will he hurt me even though he constantly keeps saying he won't. He is such a sweet guy and I like him SOOO much.

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Asked by Jrsmom2 at 11:27 AM on Oct. 3, 2008 in Relationships

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Answers (11)
  • I would not rush into anything if you have had a negative experience with him in the past. I would hold off on the sex part and see if he is in it for the long changes everything.

    Answer by salexander at 11:34 AM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • Hurt as in emotional hurt? How can he hurt you? Is he married? I'm not understanding.

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:37 AM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • He can hurt me by taking it that far and then saying all he wanted was a booty call

    Answer by Jrsmom2 at 11:43 AM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • if you dont trust him then back off and just see where it goes. dont have sex with him cause that may make him think that he can get it from you whenever he wants if thats really all hes interested in. if he acts like a pervert thats probably what he is.sounds like hes playing a game with you. men know how to talk there way into your pants.i had a lot of male "friends" that did the same thing your talking about. once you give in they will stick around for a little while and then move on to someone else.

    Answer by marykaysauer at 11:52 AM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • Well..... he said before that he didn't want to have sex with you because he didn't want to hurt you..... have you asked him if he's wanting it now because he wants to hurt you.... LOL that's just a joke. Seriously, I would be as confused as you.... sounds like he was being all 'play it cool' before and how he's turning in to "Ollie the Octopus"..... I agree with poster #1 take this slow.... it's okay that he seems sure but you don't seem sure and if it was right the first time around for him to hold out because he wasn't sure then he would be hypocritical if he is trying to convince you now when you're not sure. Slow your roll.... and get him some ice for that problem he's having in his pants.

    Answer by PaceMyself at 11:55 AM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • Sex with him should be something WAY down the line after you feel that you trust him in more emotional ways. Sex should never come early in a relationship and especially not a tool for proving something like to "see where this goes." I would be leery and not give in to that. If he truly wants to date you and cares for you, he would be patient and not pressure you for sex in any way.

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 11:55 AM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • He has not pressured me. He told me we don't have to do n e thing. I think it's me, because I am always nervous and watch what I say. I try not to flirt with him because I like him and I am unsure if he likes me. He tells me he misses me, but he is always busy. I really want us to work out.

    Also I want to be with him,, he is so sexy and turns me on where I need the ice, but I don't want him to think I am easy which I am not.....O I am SO CONFUSED!!!!

    Please no bad comments,,, Idon't want to mess things up with him. He is a great guy that has great goals like me.

    Answer by Jrsmom2 at 12:11 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • The guy i am with now pushed me away for the longest time... He said he wasnt ready!!! I didn't give up on him i kept on him and said how would we know if this is going to work if we don't give it a try... He finally gave me what i wanted and now were madly in love... And as for sex.... We are all human and if you like him and feel comfortable with him then you'll no when to take it to the next level... So go with your gut!!! I did and he is wonderful... BEST OF LUCK


    Answer by mattnryansmom at 12:22 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • seems he just wants sex if he is asking for it first thing off the bat! take it slow. if you start having sex you can get emotionally involved and if you give it up to soon or before marriage he may change his mind and then you feel like a sucker cause he got the best part of you. ok, so i'm prude about sex. i just don't see why i should give it up to a man who isn't willing to marry me. so wait and see where this goes, have sex if you want but i find that when they get sex why buy the milk when you get it for free. your asking to get hurt since it appears that's what he is wanting. i don't believe he wants to get involved. read" he's just not that into you" it's a great book tells you if a guy wants you or not, straight up.

    Answer by melody77 at 12:39 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • He probably is a sweet guy, a sweet guy that wants sex! lol Just the fact that you refer to him as an "old guy" means that you don't have a future with him at all. I would just tell him you're not interested. Good luck!

    Answer by shmorris56 at 1:57 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

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