Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Betraying a friend?

Last Saturday I went out with my girls and one of their guys came and brought his cousin. Well the cousin was talking to me most of the night and then invited us back to his place. My friend and her guy were sitting on a small couch and my friend and I were sitting on the other, the cousin came and sat next to me. We had been drinking and were having a beer. He started rubbing my leg and then he was kissing me and asked me to come into a different room with him and he tried to have sex with me but I stopped him. This guy had been talking to a different one of my friends who wasn't there that night. They'd only been texting and hung out maybe twice but nothing happened every time she had invited him out he had an excuse for why he couldn't come out or would say he hadn't decided yet and then not come out. I probably should have ended things sooner, but i really wasn't thinking. What do I do to get her to forgive me?

Answer Question

Asked by yezay at 3:42 PM on Jul. 29, 2010 in Relationships

Level 11 (567 Credits)
Answers (15)
  • I thought that I was doing the right thing by telling her the truth, but she just wont seem to forgive me and see that I made a mistake. Clearly he's not a good guy for her anyway if he'd hit on one of her friends. I just don't know what to do!

    Comment by yezay (original poster) at 3:43 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • Just try saying that you are sorry and what you said "you didn't know what you were thinking", accept responsability and give her space. it doesn't sound like their relationship was that serious so I hope she forgives you. good luck!

    Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 3:44 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • Gee Wiz... sounds like high school. I would say start socializing with REAL men and not boys who think they are players. A REAL man wouldnt be ask you to have sex when he first met you. A REAL man wouldnt play games with friends. A REAL man would act like a man and not a high school boy.


    Answer by sahlady at 3:44 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • Are you still in high school? this sounds very juvenile IMO. If he'll start trying to hump you after he just met you,he'd do the same to her. She should be thanking you for finding out how much of an asshole he really is!

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 3:45 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • Oh wait.... do I understand that you KNEW your friend was talking to him and was interested in him???? If so, you need to do nothing.... she needs to get better friends.

    Answer by sahlady at 3:45 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • Tell her this guy is not worth the loss of your friendship. He's not worth even being upset over losing. I don't think she even needs to forgive you. She should be thankiing you for exposing such a loser!

    Answer by NannyB. at 3:45 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • Thank you nanny b and butterfly. She had said that she was done with him because he kept blowing her off saying he had no money or car so she didn't want a guy like that. Obviously I am adult enough to know that he is scum for trying to sleep with me when we first met. I've tried everything to make her see that it wasn't worth all the trouble and that I should have stopped him when he kissed me. I really didn't think that she'd be that upset, but I felt like i should tell her before she found out from someone else and thought it was something more because I was hiding it.

    Comment by yezay (original poster) at 3:48 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • forgive you for what? was this guy her boyfriend? they have have 'hung out ' a few times, but sounds like he's not interested.
    for all you know she could have been texting him or seeking him out. Nothing saying he encouraged it or even wanted her around.
    sorry, but I don't see how he owed her anything or what was the wrongdoing there.

    I've had a lot of guy friends, and I've heard of stuff like this a lot. A girl decides she likes him, in many cases they weren't interested and never were. So then all of a sudden all the friends are off limits because a girl that he didn't like liked him.

    so what exactly is the problem here?

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:51 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • Even though it may totally suck at first. Honesty is the best policy. I say tell her what happened. If she is a good friend, she will get over it with time. I probably wouldn't go any farther with that guy though if your friendship is important to you. Best of luck.

    Answer by AmyLind at 3:51 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • why is he being called a player? has he even really had a date with this girl?
    boy, you ladies are assuming!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:52 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.