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How can I get a one year old and a three year old to listen and understand that they can't do what they want?

I have a 16 month old who refuses to walk and wants his way at all times. He has gotten so bad if we go somewhere that he don't want to go he makes us leave. The wanting his way he will scream until he gets it and if you don't give it and try to make him mind he bites! The three year old has watched him so much that she has started. She refuses to eat if we try to make her eat she will make herself gag or puke. She won't listen, has attitude and when you try to correct her she has started the spitting in your face.. Someone please please help!

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Mommyof4224

Asked by Mommyof4224 at 7:56 PM on Jul. 29, 2010 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 3 (13 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • i would start serious discipline, if you spank spank or time outs. i wouldn't accept that behavior at all. if your lil one wants to leave i would sit with him in the car and tell him he's not getting his way. as far as eating goes as long as she's at the table that's fine, eventually she will eat when she gets hungry enough.
    angevil53

    Answer by angevil53 at 7:58 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • You need to figure out what form of discipline that you are going to use and stick with it. Once they figure out that things don't go there way they will start to mind and behave. If she doesn't eat her dinner then she goes to be hungry. As for your bitter, I would bite him back. I know it sounds cruel but it works. If your 3 yo is bitting as well I would bite her too. When I did it I said "We don't bite it hurts--see". My DD was about 10 or 11 mos when I did this. She hasn't had an issue since. The spitting needs to be dealt with ASAP. You and Dad need to get on the same page and stand strong. I don't put up with disrespect and that is exactly what your kids are doing. I wish you luck.
    coala

    Answer by coala at 8:03 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • Do no give in. You stated that your son makes you leave. He is 16 months old, he can not MAKE you leave. You leave because he causes a scene. Do not give in. I agree, if you DD doesn't want to eat, don't make her. But don't give her what she wants. She can go hungry or she can eat what you offer. Even if she goes to bed hungry, it's not going to hurt her. Find a method of discipline you are comfortable with and stick with and be consistent. YOU are in control, not the kids.
    layh41407

    Answer by layh41407 at 8:31 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • About the eating.......don't make your child eat. Have meals that she has always liked, let her have what she wants and then that's all for that meal. Many mealtimes were ruined in our home because my husband insisted our picky eater eat a certain amount. We all would have been much happier if we had just let him eat what he wanted at each meal. And if he left the table hungry he would have been fine until the next time.

    Discipline your children consistently and calmly. Have an agreed upon method with your husband. Taking away something that is really important to them worked in our house. Every child has something they can not "live" without. Tell them it will be withheld and do not change your mind. Withhold it for an appropriate time which is not too long with little ones. It will be tough in the beginning if they are not used to discipline. Discipline is not punishment. It is structure and guidelines. GL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:36 PM on Jul. 29, 2010

  • I THINK THAT EVERY CHILD GOES THROUGH THAT STAGE WERE THEY THINK THEY ARE THERE OWN BOSS. MY OLDEST DAUGHTER STILL ACTS LIKE THAT SOMETIMES. AND U WOULD THINK THAT SHE KNOWS BETTER BUT I DONT THINK THEY GRAPS THE PROBLEM WITH THAT. THAT WE ARRE ONLY DOING THOSE THING TO PROCTECT THEM AND SHOW THEM THE RIGHT WAY. WELL TWO AND THREE YEAR OLDS DONT UNDERSTAND THAT.
    rocknmom940

    Answer by rocknmom940 at 12:46 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

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