Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

HE was unfaithful once but he doesn't get why I can't trust him now..

While I was pregnant with our first child my husband decided to secretly see a women behind my back. I would recieve messages from this women telling me I am a bitch and I was a POS that didn't deserve him.. Well on his day off we were relaxing and then decided to go out he went and took a shower and his phone was ringing I didn't answer but then his message went off so I checked it. It was a picture of a women breast and the message said, " mine are better then her's I promise." Well I was so pissed! As soon as he walked in the room I punched him in the face threw all his shit out and never wanted to see him again. Long story short I forgave him cause he said nothing happen, but now it seems like he is doing it all over again. But this time he is using a friend as a cover. I can't trust him and I don't think I want this anymore. What would you do?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:15 PM on Jul. 30, 2010 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Have you confronted him, or asked him about it? Honesty is so important in relationships. If you don't trust him, I would not stay with him, as you will always doubt him, and always believe him to be cheating. Forgiveness is one thing...But if you think he's doing it again, and has done it in the past...I would say he would do it in the future too.
    quinnbee21

    Answer by quinnbee21 at 8:18 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • i would of left his ass a long time ago!
    what are you crazy?
    you better get the hell away from him before he brings you home herpes or aids!
    youll find someone better!!
    PURPULbutterfly

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 8:18 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • I would call the lady he is seeing and tell her she can have him. Then I would tell him he is single now. And divorce him.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 8:18 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • You may have just answered your own question. I love marriage...I love fidelity, and nuclear families and the whole bit. But what I will never understand is why two people who do not have mutual respect and love for each other stay together. Don't say it's for the kids: You want them to grow up seeing dysfunction-junction and thinking it's normal, or good? If you have no trust, you HAVE no relationship. Ask hubby what he wants. If he can't tell you immediately and in no uncertain terms, don't drag out the misery. You deserve to be happy. A happy single woman is a better mother than her miserably married counterpart. I've said it before...divorce is HARD...getting married is too easy.
    mommyx9

    Answer by mommyx9 at 8:21 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Not being able to trust him would be a deal breaker for me. Do what is best for you.
    elizabr

    Answer by elizabr at 8:24 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • drag him off to marriage counseling.
    onethentwins

    Answer by onethentwins at 8:28 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • i recently dealt with some crap with my husband...it never got as bad as what you are going through, but i know your feelings, and honestly if my husband did anything like he did again he would be gone. the hurt, the games, the lies, the betrayal, the stress and lack of trust is only bringing you down. and i am sure making it hard for you to be the best mom you can be. i am no where near being over what happened in my situation and it does take time. i still wonder. but for you, if you think he is up to his same old tricks again, you need to ask yourself what is better for you and your self esteem and your family. no one can tell you the right thing to do. it's hard when life changes and things go awry. can you handle it....good luck.
    xtwilightx

    Answer by xtwilightx at 8:36 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.