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what to do when the decisons are extremely opposite???

so i have temporary custody legal and physical. it is only temporary so it is very scary if we get joint legal custody! our baby is 3 months old and we already are doing this. i have gone to my church for 10 years now since i have moved here. i am a firm believer in my faith. when i found i was pg i invited him to my church and tried to evolve him so the baby could go to sunday service with us both and have a firm moral standard. well that lasted 3 weeks in the pregnancy much like he did when he said church was a F##ing joke and then didnt hear from him till the dna results. i told him i dont want my son going to two diff. churches he said he wouldn't let our son go to my church. then he said that he wanted to give up drugs and alcohol for church(fake). his church is so not anything of my religion they are very opposite in everything. put it this way there have no bible, unlike mine.WHat TO DO???

Answer Question
 
Troy56

Asked by Troy56 at 8:54 PM on Jul. 30, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 3 (23 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • and i want him to go to the private school that our church offers he say public..this school is highly recommended..i say white he says black. what happens when we go for permanent and they give us joint legal EVERYTHING will be a battle that i cant afford.
    Troy56

    Comment by Troy56 (original poster) at 8:56 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • A 3 month old isn't going to be affected by ANY church. I'd worry later on this one
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 8:56 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • I wouldn't start worrying about schools just yet.
    JGRIMMER

    Answer by JGRIMMER at 8:58 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • Just wondering what the two religions are?
    JGRIMMER

    Answer by JGRIMMER at 8:58 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • i feel even tho he is 3 months he still hears and eventually will understand more..just because he is only 3 months does not mean that he can be subjected to anything and everything!
    Troy56

    Comment by Troy56 (original poster) at 8:59 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • Pray your childs dad becomes a dead beat dat. And does not want anything to do with him. so you can raise the chid the way you want.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 9:07 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • I think it is good to have him raised with 2 different views. He will be more well rounded and more accepting of others and their beliefs. I am sure that as he grows up, he will feel drawn more fully to 1 of the two teaches.

    my husband also believes that organized religion is a crock, but I am Catholic and very involved in my parish. While I do not agree with all of the teaching, I do agree with most of them and there are no teaching that while I am not 100% on board with, but I am able to respect their views. Both of my kids attend mass with me each Sunday, my husband knows that he is welcome to join us, but I do not push the issue. This is something he has to want and choose for himself, not something you can force on other people.

    I think that is what pisses people off the most. When others try to force their faith on them and make them feel "bad" for not sharing the same beliefs
    Maureen-MD

    Answer by Maureen-MD at 9:09 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • I agree with butterflyblue19. A 3 month old isn't going to be affected by any church right now. Its more like when they get older like 4 or 5 years of age. Some churches don't have bibles and that find. If you baby father is going to that has a lot of worship and praising and sing that find and if they do something different than ur church thats find too. It is his preference on how he want to spend with ur baby. I have joint custody and at first my ex and I did not talk to each other at first, but eventrly we did b/c its not about us its about our son and how we want to raise and teach him all together. Ur ex might have some type of issue with private school like for the fact it does cost a lot to put a kid through that and public school is awesome depending on what state u r into. But u have nothing to worry about for now cause it will be a while before ur baby reaches for school age.

    andmaef28

    Answer by andmaef28 at 9:09 PM on Jul. 30, 2010

  • Honestly, these are issues to settle on before deciding to bring a child into the relationship.

    For the sake of your child, please find a couples counselor to work with you and help you both find common ground.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 9:44 AM on Jul. 31, 2010

  • Honestly, these are issues to settle on before deciding to bring a child into the relationship.

    For the sake of your child, please find a couples counselor to work with you and help you both find common ground. >>>>>

    I agree with this!
    Judmr

    Answer by Judmr at 10:14 AM on Jul. 31, 2010

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