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HOW DO I START OVER, AFTER 1 DIVORCE, AND A 6 LONG YEARS IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP?

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mmm10578

Asked by mmm10578 at 1:59 PM on Jul. 31, 2010 in Relationships

Level 5 (84 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • I think its about time you start thinking about you and your kids... Forget about the abuser and move on.. Focus on you before you rush into another relationship...
    Claudiomom

    Answer by Claudiomom at 2:01 PM on Jul. 31, 2010

  • Swear off men completely for a good long time. Give yourself time to heal and to asses what you really want in a man. I'm talking about character and not good looks or sex appeal. Once you have decided if you even want to try again, then keep away from physical involvement until after you are married. Nothing clouds the senses and causes a woman to miss key character traits in a man like becoming sexually involved. Also, never ever settle for a man who is looking for anything less than marriage and lifetime commitment. If he's looking for anything else, tell him to keep right on looking. While you are in the healing process, observe other married men. Watch how they treat their wives and children. Make it your goal, should you decide to try again, to find a man whom you admire and respect and that you would want your children to have as a positive role model. The key thing right now is to WAIT and HEAL!!
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 2:09 PM on Jul. 31, 2010

  • THANK YOU BOTH 4 UR ADVICE, I LEFT AT THE BEGINNING OF JULY THIS YEAR AND NOT INTERESTED IN GETTING INTO ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP FOR A LONG WHILE.
    mmm10578

    Comment by mmm10578 (original poster) at 2:26 PM on Jul. 31, 2010

  • Its gonna take awhile till ur ready move on to dating and all.Main thing is focus on urself and take care of ur kids first. You'll know when the time is right to start dating.You'll find the one guy who will treat u with respect and the way u should be treated.Just leave it in gods hands. =) I know how it is.I've been there.I was never married but I was in a relationship for 8yrs.
    brokenheartmom

    Answer by brokenheartmom at 2:37 PM on Jul. 31, 2010

  • Don't get into another relationship for a long time. You need to sit back and really look at your life. Think about the things that you want to do, where you want to go, who you want in your life. The put for the motions to make those things happen. Once you start living for you again you'll start to become happier. You're free of the abuse (I hope), free of the divorce, you're just you now. You can be happy living the life that you want without harm or negative reaction. Enjoy your life!
    JazzlikeMraz

    Answer by JazzlikeMraz at 2:52 PM on Jul. 31, 2010

  • 1 step at a time is what it takes to move on get help if you need to with counseling, anything financial if you need to to help you get back on your feet. I commend you for taking that 1st step to freedom. You will survive might be tough sometimes ,but just look back over what you had and know you are making the 1st steps to a better, healthier you!
    Like everyone else said no relationships for a while. Go out and explore, do things that you have always wanted to do. Bile ride, read books, volunteer somehwhere. Whatever you think will make you happy in the end.
    Good Luck!
    Moms_Angels1960

    Answer by Moms_Angels1960 at 5:00 PM on Jul. 31, 2010

  • yeah i would just worry about yourself & your kid & later on love will find you when the time is right
    Ricanmami1

    Answer by Ricanmami1 at 5:07 PM on Jul. 31, 2010

  • It takes a strong person to do what ur doing I admire ur strength and always rember a few months of struggling are worth it in exchange for ur peice of mind health and well being i wish u the best and will be praying for u during this troubling time....
    pamelovexxx

    Answer by pamelovexxx at 12:27 AM on Aug. 1, 2010

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