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Should my 4 year old be expected to "focus" in pre-k?

The teacher said he is VERY mature for his age, but that he needs to focus. I thought pre-k was more fun and learning, not so stressful. She said he is not a disruptive, just needs to focus. Is this normal or is she crazy?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:32 PM on Oct. 3, 2008 in General Parenting

Answers (9)
  • She's crazy. At the age of four, if a child isn't acting aggressive, most parents and teachers would be thankful. That child needs to be a child. That's the problem with people now, they're trying to make children grow up too fast.
    KenKie

    Answer by KenKie at 7:34 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • You're sending him pre-k so that he will learn something.... It's school....

    If you were wanting something more "fun" then I think play dates would be in order.....

    That's what "school" is all about it's about listening to the teacher and doing what she wants you to do when she wants you to do it, and how she wants you to do it....even in Pre-K!!
    SAHMinIL

    Answer by SAHMinIL at 7:36 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • My son was kindergarten and was told since he can't focus and stay still he would probaly be held back... I said oh really lets just see my son has never been held back he has been on the honor roll since he could recieve letter grades. Kid s will be kids they have to get use to sitting in a structure setting.

    4kids1970

    Answer by 4kids1970 at 7:36 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • well if they're they're doing actual work, then yes, he does need to focus. i used to be a pre-k teacher. we had kids that played when they were supposed to and focused on their work, and we also had kids that didn't like to focus on their work, and just play. although, if she says he's very mature for his age, maybe he's just bored with the work? we've also had kids like that, that needed to be more challenged in their work so we put them in an older class and they did better.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:37 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • PreK is preparing them for K and in kindergarten they are having to learn to read and write sentences. In preK my son had to memorize the way his name was written and be able to write it. They don't focus for long only 15-20 minutes and a 4 y/o should be able to do that.
    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 8:06 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • I didn't start my son in Pre K until he was 5 although I could have when he was 4 but didn't think he was ready. All children are different and learn differently with different styles. I live in a small town and spoke with many mothers who weren't starting their kids until this later time. I have also done research on this and especially boys it's better to send them later than earlier. I don't know if that could be why or if it's like the other post said.. he is too bored and needs to be challenged more. I had many pre k programs to choose from so if it's not working out due to a teacher problem maybe you could just move him. Good Luck
    fbic72

    Answer by fbic72 at 8:53 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • I don't agree with having a child sit at a desk all day. I am looking into sending my son to a Waldorf type of school (they are located through out the country) where they understand that kids learn best when they can be active and expressive during learning. Everyone I know who has sent their kid to one of these schools have all become very well rounded. Most schools try to slap the ADHD label on so many kids because they are trying to teach them against the natural development. When I was in college I couldn't stay focused and that is because I learn in a different way than most people. I am very visual rather than verbal. So maybe your kid has a different way of learning than the standard teaching practices. You can kinda test him or her yourself. Show them a picture and see how much they remember then do the same thing after telling them a story. And the post about boredom held true for me too.
    MommyStar502

    Answer by MommyStar502 at 9:21 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • I don't think her child is expected to sit at a desk "all day" and focus. Focus tends more to mean when the children are in "circle time" and most likely going through the calendar or daily jobs he should be paying attention and involved. While in small group learning, he should be on task whether that task be coloring a picture or answering a question. No licensed teacher expects ANY child, advanced or not, to focus completely throughout the day. They SHOULD however be expected to focus for small spans of time to learn.
    bdotmom

    Answer by bdotmom at 9:26 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

  • I HAVE TAUGHT IN MANY PRE-K CLASSES. IT IS PRETTY MUCH STANDARD THAT THE CHILDREN ARE ONLY ON A TASK THAT DEMANDS FOCUS FOR 15 MINUTES TOPS. THEY CHANGE ACTIVITIES OFTEN DUE TO THE FACT THAT AT THAT AGE CHILDREN NEED TO BE ACTIVE. YOUR SON SHOULD BE ABLE TO HANDLE THAT AMOUNT OF TIME, BUT I THINK THE TEACHER SHOULD HAVE BEEN A LITTLE MORE DESCRIPTIVE OF WHAT SHE IS TALKING ABOUT. SEVERAL OF THE POST ABOVE HOLD MERIT. HE COULD BE BORED, HAVE TROUBLE WITH THAT TEACHING METHOD, OR HE JUST SIMPLY WANTS TO PLAY. I WOULD TALK FURTHER WITH THE TEACHER AND FIND OUT WHAT EXPECTATION HE ISNT HOLDING UP TO. GOOD LUCK.
    alicia_4307

    Answer by alicia_4307 at 10:36 PM on Oct. 3, 2008

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