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How can I get my grandmother to stop putting pull ups on my 4 year old?!?!?!

Ok ladies my son is 4 has been peeing in the potty since he was 2. Going #2 hasnt been so easy. He once got constipated and it got to the point it scared him and he would only go in his pants. I eventually took him to his doc. She put him on some meds to help loosen his stools and things have been great ever since. However, whenever he goes to my grandmothers house she puts a pull up on him. She says it is because she doesnt want him to get the sheets wet and because he wont go on the toilet which I know is bull. My son has already says she puts them on him when his butt hurts so he can go poop. Then when he comes home I have to completely re-potty train him. I have discussed this with her and she says she'll stop but won't. Just like I ask her to not give him gum and she does anyways. I don't know how to tell her to stop without getting her upset. Any suggestions?? I really need help with this!!!

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travisnowensmom

Asked by travisnowensmom at 12:24 PM on Aug. 2, 2010 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 14 (1,379 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • Why do you keep letting him go without you if you know how she's treating him? If she can't look after him then don't send him.
    RhondaVeggie

    Answer by RhondaVeggie at 12:25 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

  • i have the same problem! my sister in law did the samething. i told her if she couldn't follow the rules then she wouldn't see her until her went to first grade. my kids went to preschool, and the first rule to the one i sent them to was they had to be potty-trained.
    noel1978

    Answer by noel1978 at 12:30 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

  • I would just tell her that putting a pull-up on is making him regress. If he does poop in his pants at Grandma's, it's only because she has basically taught him that at her house he can go in his pants, instead of the potty. Maybe you should bring over an extra potty seat or chair for her house and maybe you can have your son show her how he uses it. You know, like "Grandma, mommy got me a special seat for your house so I don't have to wear pull-ups anymore, Let me show you how it works." Maybe this will open her eyes and also help your son to know that no matter where he is, he should use the potty, not his pants. If she is un-willing, I would just tell her that he will have to wait till the age that grandma thinks he should be fully potty trained for him to come over without mom.
    JGRIMMER

    Answer by JGRIMMER at 12:30 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

  • he hasnt been over to her house in months. He went last week because currently I am 37 weeks pregnant and on bed rest. My doc took me off all my meds to stop contractions and they have been really bad. She took him for me to give me a little break. And what you said about not sending him there...thats what I am leaning towards. I know she will ask to take him and I'll just have to tell her no. I just dont want to hurt her feelings. She's 67 and loves him very very much. She raised me as well so she is like a mother to me.
    travisnowensmom

    Comment by travisnowensmom (original poster) at 12:32 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

  • I would stop letting him go over there until she can stop doing that.
    NOLAmommaKRYS

    Answer by NOLAmommaKRYS at 12:35 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

  • Don't send the kid over there.
    babyfat5

    Answer by babyfat5 at 12:38 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

  • Does she buy the pull ups? I've had probs in the past where I've been undermined.Ask yourself this,if it were someone undermining her,how would she deal with it?
    TootieFruitie

    Answer by TootieFruitie at 12:50 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

  • It IS her home and her sheets. If you don't like how she does things in HER home, then don't let him spend the night at Grammas. It is that simple. AND tell her why, but do it politely..
    gertie41

    Answer by gertie41 at 12:53 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

  • the thing I dont understand about the sheets...is she has had 2 sons, took care of me and my little brother practically from the time we were born and never did that with us. She even admitted she didnt. And if it was someone undermining her she would through for lack of a better term "a shit fit" lol
    travisnowensmom

    Comment by travisnowensmom (original poster) at 12:58 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

  • Just tell her flat out that if she won't respect your parenting choices, then she will have to come visit him in your home instead of him going there.
    riotgrrl

    Answer by riotgrrl at 1:26 PM on Aug. 2, 2010

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