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would this bother you?

I'm a nanny. The other day, the father of the kids I watch got home from a trip overseas. I was baking cookies with the 2 kids (ages 9 and 12) and my 5 year old son. The dad came over and kissed his kids hello and handed them presents he got them. He didn't even say hi to my son. So, they opened their gifts, it didn't bother my kid at all. We go back to cutting out cookies, and he comes over with a big box of chocolates (from the airport here) and offers one to his son (his other kid was out of the room), his son picked one with a silver wrapper. Didn't offer my guy one even though there were plenty. So my son speaks up and asks nicely if he could also have a silver one. The dad said "Don't take all the silver ones or there won't be any left" and picked out another (hazelnut) and said "you might like this one" but then HE ate it and left the room without giving my son anything. Who the H*LL treats a little boy that way?!

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:02 PM on Aug. 3, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (16)
  • "employer/employee, as opposed to being treated as a family member... then he is only acting with in the established roles"


    Well, I nanny and my child and I are treated as members of that family just as I treat the 2 children I care for as my own children. Caring for children is not just a job... its a bond. I feel like I'm making an impact on the children and we have a much different relationship than say, a teller at the bank, or a hair stylist. Some people simply can't see outside of their own conceded heads and wouldn't consider the fact that there is another child, with feelings, in the room who may feel left out. The guy was inconsiderate and uncaring. A child is a child, and even the most 'mannered' child would probably politely ask for a piece of candy if all of the other children got one! I'd hardly consider asking for a piece of candy in this situation to be "begging". Sheesh.

    kenzie07

    Answer by kenzie07 at 9:58 AM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • That is absolutely terrible. I agree with hsmominky and you should start looking for another employer! I nanny and the people I work for are great to my son. Try Care.com. That is a great site to find nanny jobs. Some men are ignorant when it comes to the feelings of someone else's kids, but your son was respectful and asked nicely to have a freaken candy. Seriously, how selfish is that? I think I would have said something to my son like, "don't worry about it, there are people in this world that just haven't learned good manners the way you have. I will get you some better chocolate on the way home for being so polite and asking so nicely, and I'm sorry that he treated you like that." I would try to say it loud enough so the dad could hear. If I had the guts and was pissed enough, I think I would have said something to the dad.
    JGRIMMER

    Answer by JGRIMMER at 8:24 PM on Aug. 3, 2010

  • omg, how aweful, and this is your employer to top it off! Has he been this way with your son before? That was just plain rude of this jerk, sorry I dont see why he did that at all..
    beyondhopes

    Answer by beyondhopes at 8:06 PM on Aug. 3, 2010

  • I think I would have been annoyed with him when it came to the chocolate also. That was quite rude.
    Juggalette0327

    Answer by Juggalette0327 at 8:07 PM on Aug. 3, 2010

  • Ya. He kinda lacked some class. Seems as if you and your son in his mind, are worker status and that's all.
    He doesn't have to bring back stuff for you guys, but he should have enough respect to say hello, and do gifts at a better time. After all, you are an important and influential part of his kids' lives.
    thelowlander

    Answer by thelowlander at 8:08 PM on Aug. 3, 2010

  • That was very rude. It sounds like he doesn't have respect for you or your son. I think that I may start looking for another employer.
    hsmominky

    Answer by hsmominky at 8:11 PM on Aug. 3, 2010

  • That sounds weird. Wonder why he did that...
    1lilgirl

    Answer by 1lilgirl at 8:11 PM on Aug. 3, 2010

  • Well I guess you now know exactly your place.... you are the help.

    I know many people who have nannies... some treat them like family, and some treat them like help. Sorry you are working for a family who views you as help... that suxs!
    sahlady

    Answer by sahlady at 8:20 PM on Aug. 3, 2010

  • Aww, that's terrible! Sounds like you are a truly good nanny for baking with the kiddos. Seems like he would've shown some appreciation for that. Sounds like you are making a great effort to engage the children and take special care of his children and he should've treated your little one with some kindness. What a bum :-(
    kenzie07

    Answer by kenzie07 at 8:24 PM on Aug. 3, 2010

  • You know, maybe I would say something to the mom instead, if you want to keep your job. I would tell her what happened and that you would appreciate it if she could talk to her Husband about waiting to give the children gifts till you son is gone and that if he is handing out candy, your son should atleast be offered a piece. And if the Husband doesn't want your son to have the silver candy, he should wait till after your son is gone before offering it to his kids. Some people are just that stupid.
    JGRIMMER

    Answer by JGRIMMER at 8:31 PM on Aug. 3, 2010

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