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If your SO is an alcholic, how hard is it to get them to almost anything?

My DH is an acholic and at the end of the day, he can down about a 12 pack of beer in 2 hours. It really hard to get him to go to bed, to get off the soap box of whatever is on the television. This has been an issue between us for so long...

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guyandtoni01

Asked by guyandtoni01 at 10:45 AM on Aug. 4, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (698 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • My husband has been sober for 5 years.
    Have you ever tried to go down that road?
    Rachel24517

    Answer by Rachel24517 at 10:48 AM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • My 1st husband was like that and he is actually worse now that we are gone. Alot of time gets wasted when a person is tied down to drinking. It won't get better unless he quits drinking. Either accept it or move on. Also going to an Ala-non group would be helpful.
    togo90210

    Answer by togo90210 at 10:50 AM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • as long as you enable him, he will not change. you are giving him no reason to stop. you have to make his problem HIS instead of yours. i assume you have children? do you want them to think this is OK?
    sati769leigh

    Answer by sati769leigh at 10:58 AM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • He is working with our doctor to settle his nerves and anxiety. He has quit multiple time, some lasting 3 to 4 weeks. Both of us grew up with alcoholic fathers and we agreed prior to our marriage that if either of us gets to that far, we each stated who we wanted to help the other to get us to rehab. I have called DH's BIL and he has talked to him. Long story short, DH has tried to keep the amount to a minimum at his idea of minimum. Our two chilren know exactly how thier dad is and get frustrated with him.
    guyandtoni01

    Comment by guyandtoni01 (original poster) at 11:10 AM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • My DH doesn't drink (except a half a beer once in awhile), but my dad is (was?) an alcoholic and I will tell you, it's one of the hardest things to deal with. My mom was an enabler big time and she refused to even believe he was an alcoholic. Seriously we got into an argument with it one time. A man who would start drinking from the moment he got off work at 3:30 (earlier on the weekend) until closing time everyday is not an alcoholic? I haven't talked to my dad in 10 years which is why I don't really know if he still drinks or not. My mom doesn't say much. He never got help for it, she never tried to get help for it. I washed my hands of him when I moved away.

    You still have the ability to get help for yours. Stage an intervention if you have to, and do it before your kids grow up hating their dad, much like I do mine.
    thatgirl70

    Answer by thatgirl70 at 11:20 AM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • my family has a lot of drunks and drug addicts. so...

    i can say your best bet is for him to slow down the drinking to a reasonable level. if he has one or two beers every night, some say that is an addiction and i agree it is but i would say that is acceptable in some istuations. but a 12 pack...he's only going to get worse , alcohol is a depressant and the older he gets the more that depressant affect will happen and themore he will need to appease his bodies addiction.

    btw...do not blame yourself. so many wives do that in your situation. he is the one drinking his night away
    moki1984

    Answer by moki1984 at 11:42 AM on Aug. 4, 2010

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