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What do i do if i feel like my relationship with my fiance is falling apart but he doesnt think it is?

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noahsmommy12908

Asked by noahsmommy12908 at 1:52 PM on Aug. 4, 2010 in Relationships

Level 19 (6,645 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Do not stay just because he is happy. If you are not happy, get out the the relationship.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 1:54 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • Communicate, if you feel like it is, then it is, even if he doesn't see it. It takes two people to make the relationship work, and I'm sure that the reasons you feel like it's falling apart aren't all your fault. Talk to him make this clear and start working on it if that's what you want. Good luck
    Liz132

    Answer by Liz132 at 1:55 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • I honestly feel like some men in general do not have a clue sometimes. I go through this with my husband, we've been together for a long time and we still somehow do not communicate. I've had periods where I feel like him and I are not clicking, where we are distant from each other, I try to tell him and he freaks out and says "I thought we were doing great" and they I start to name things that have happened and then he realizes why I feel like we are off, then we try to get back on track. I say the best thing is to approach your fiance and explain to him why you feel the way you feel and see if you can move forward to correct those things. Good luck!
    LuvmyFam6

    Answer by LuvmyFam6 at 1:55 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • Sit down and talk it tell him how you feel and what you see happening. Maybe you can suggest counceling to him do so before it gets to far out of hand.GL momma
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 1:55 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • Depends on why you think it is falling apart, and why he thinks it isn't.

    Sounds like possibly one is happy with things as is, one is not...

    If that is the case, then what I would do is this. I would do my best to communicate to my husband (in the communication style that he would fully understand and comprehend what I was sharing) what it is about our relationship that was making me unhappy, what could change to help make me happy in our relationship, and how we could work together to accomplish that. I would also listen to him as well and do my best to understand his side.

    I would also take a good look into myself. And see if some of the things that are making me unhappy, actually stem from within me and not my relationship. Sometimes I get unhappy with things, and I realise that it's not really my husband or our relationship that is making me unhappy. It's something about "me", that is. And I have to address that.
    pixie_trix

    Answer by pixie_trix at 1:57 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • Why exactly arent you happy? Have you told him that there is something that you dont like? Guys cant read minds, and apparently body language. He's clueless until you tell him. Just remember that it takes two to make it work, and you both cant be doing 50. Some day one is doing 78 and the other is doing 22.
    Chin up, talk to him. Tell him how you are feel and why. And if he still doesnt care, think about leaving, it wont get better after your married. But YOU NEED to talk to him first.
    browningmom

    Answer by browningmom at 1:58 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • Why do you feel it's falling apart? If he's your fiance, don't you think if would be responsible to talk about your relationship and feelings? Do you talk about your relationship and feelings? Don't get married for the wrong reasons either. This is one of the reasons why divorces are so high. Or at least one of the many reasons. Maybe he is fine and your not? Having doubts or reservations? Doesn't sound like the next level should be marriage but rather extend your engagement and work things out.
    Now, go do the right thing!
    NikkiVan1

    Answer by NikkiVan1 at 2:00 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • You know there have been several occassions where I have felt disconnected from my husband and worried that things were not working. What I have found to work is , I need to make an effort to spend more time with my man, it when i set aside time for just him and I to hang out that we reconnect. I find that in course of hanging out and doing things my man communicates better than when he is confronted. Maybe this will work for you as well. i hope so.

    Also just a little side note, please don't marry your man until you feel this problem is resolved (it could be cold feet it could be something more) but you need to address it before moving forward. Marriage is supposse to be a lifetime committment, do you really want to be committed forever to something that is already not working?
    FuzNet

    Answer by FuzNet at 2:04 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • If you feel like it's falling apart then there is a problem, regardless of what he thinks. You need to talk to him about the issue(s), and then work them out together. If he's not willing to work on the relationship with you, I wouldn't be in any hurry to marry him.
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 2:36 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

  • Men don't see things the way women do. If things don't seem right, spend time with him and talk to him to try to resolve your feelings. Sometimes I think women think things are not right sometimes when things settle. So it could be that.
    bjane01

    Answer by bjane01 at 2:46 PM on Aug. 4, 2010

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