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If you found out one of your kids were gay, would you allow them to have friends stay the night?

I used to watch the L word and now they have the reality series based on the L word. Well, one of the cast members was talking about when she came out to her parents at age fourteen, they didn't allow her to have friends spend the night anymore. So it got me wondering what would I do if I were in that situation. I honestly don't know what I would do if one of my daughters came out to me at an early age. Of course I would support her, but I would probably treat her the same way I would if she were straight and had a boyfriend over. I'd want her to maintain some boundaries.

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GinNTonic

Asked by GinNTonic at 3:10 AM on Aug. 5, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 18 (6,147 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • definitely no more sleep overs. so if they're straight, they cant have opposite sex sleepovers, and if theyr gay they shouldnt be allowed to have same sex sleepovers either. no way. same rules apply/.ur doing the right thing.
    fefe87

    Answer by fefe87 at 3:16 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • just because your child is gay/lesbian doesnt mean that the friend they brought over for a sleep over is. I think I may have them sleep in a common room like the living room, but I wouldnt stop them all together
    cassie_kellison

    Answer by cassie_kellison at 3:17 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • Yeah. I guess that's where I'd be stuck because even though my child might be a lesbian it doesnt' mean any of their friends are.
    GinNTonic

    Comment by GinNTonic (original poster) at 3:30 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • Nope. That would then be the same thing as if my daughter wanted to have a boyfriend spend the night. That would be a Hell No, Not Under My Roof, thing.
    m-avi

    Answer by m-avi at 3:38 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • Of course I would. And if they were hell bent on having sex with their friends it certainly wouldn't require a sleepover. Where would you draw the line? Never allowing them to be with a same sex friend without an adult present until they go off to college?

    Do you worry every time your hetero kid is hanging out with the opposite sex? That's ridiculous. At a certain point you need to trust that you've raised your children well.

    deadheadjen

    Answer by deadheadjen at 9:09 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • I would still allow sleepovers.
    mamallamaof2

    Answer by mamallamaof2 at 9:45 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • Wait...what about for those kids who don't 'come out.' Should sleepovers be banned all together just in case you missed the signs? Honestly, we don't do sleepovers period. It's more of a safety issue for us adults. I won't put myself in a situation where a parent/child could accuse me/my wife of anything inappropriate. I held this stance while I was still married to my ex (a man) as well. I also refuse to transport a child/teen in my car unless I know the parent personally b/c I am not interested in taking the chance.
    semazani

    Answer by semazani at 2:23 PM on Aug. 5, 2010

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