Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

what do you think

In a r/ship why is it that only a woman has to take care of kids.See when two ppl are 2gether,they enjoy themselves.both decide to have kids.Then in case they get seperated,why is it always a female who has to take the responsibility of kids

Answer Question

Asked by A11 at 5:18 AM on Aug. 5, 2010 in Relationships

Level 17 (3,687 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • It's not always. There are plenty of dad's that step up and take the kids, or even dad's that stay home while the mother works....

    Answer by MomtoElliett at 5:21 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • I've noticed that more and more the dad's are taking care of th children. There are a lot of mom's who leave and never come back to see their children. Times are changing.

    Answer by queen.bee at 6:31 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • My husband (before we were married) put his foot down and when we were discussing what to do about my pregnancy he said there was no way he would let me put our child up for adoption and he'd take care of it himself with or without me. It was that passionate dedication that convinced me to marry him. We are 3.5 years strong and have since had a second child.

    My oldest sister had a child out of wedlock, married another man and he adopted the child. They had two more children before she decided one day it was not for her and she left her family. He took care of all three children, eventually remarried, still has custody of all 3 and takes excellent care of them and their step siblings.

    Sadly those are rare stories, but the PPs are right that it is a growing trend. Don't trust what you see in movies and on TV. Unfortunately women are not always careful about the type of men they sleep with and simply take their chances.

    Answer by Friskitriski at 6:56 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • It's not always like that. My ex husband & I share joint custody. He is a great dad for the most part & wants her at his house as much as possible. He loves her to pieces & does a good job when she is with him. We share her 50/50. She is at my house for a week, then dads house for a week. He is a good caret taker. He might forget to brush her hair before, but she is clean, fed & loved over there.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 7:23 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • There is another kind of man and there is another kind of lifestyle than the one you describe. I do think that too many women get left holding the bag full of responsibility, but it is also true that every woman has the freedom of choice in the man she picks and in the lifestyle she embraces.Too many women rush into sexual relations with men before they have studied his habits and determined what life with him might be like. Then she is completely blinded to his real character but only for a while. When she becomes pregnant with the first child, she begins to see his true colors. Now if she leaves, it's too late for the baby to have the kind of home every child needs and deserves. So she will hang on for a while, but the guy is not committed to the mom nor to the child and feels no responsibility. The other kind comes looking for a wife, makes the committment and works his tail off for all of them for the next 50 or so years.

    Answer by NannyB. at 8:11 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • My DH would have gladly been the custodial parent, his ex fought him and the courts said that children need to be under the care of their mother. (He still has 50-50). Our society, and the courts, have made the determination that mothers are better care givers, I know plenty of other men that would gladly take more responsibility - but the courts and mothers won't allow them to. Some guys are deadbeats, but there are those that would happily take on a larger role.

    Answer by Scuba at 10:12 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.