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How do I fix this?

My SO and I live in AZ, all of my family is in Cali. I work 45 hours a week at a job that I hate. My DD is in daycare for the 45 hours a week too. I'm not home much and I don't get to spend much time with my DD. My SO is not bio dad, so the responsibility isn't equal (like it would be with bio dad) he works 30 hours a week and goes to school. The deal was that when he got out of school in December we would move closer to my family so that my DD and I had some support. Well, now he has switched majors and will be going for another 2 years. I'm not happy here, I want to spend more time with my DD before she starts kindergarten in a year. I can't really cut back my hours because my SO doesn't make enough to cover more of the bills... What should I do?

Answer Question

Asked by allfiller at 10:48 AM on Aug. 5, 2010 in Relationships

Level 12 (802 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • You do what you have to do to support your family.
    Your SO should be showing you some support regardless of him not being DDs bio-dad, you're a package and should focus less on himself and more on you two. Is there not a school he can transfer to closer to your family?

    Answer by bumblebeestingu at 10:52 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • He doesn't want to transfer or move now because I guess some of his credits wont transfer and he says in Cali it is more expensive to live and he will have to find a new job. He just says its not logical right now.

    Comment by allfiller (original poster) at 10:54 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • I would pack up my child and move back closer to my family. I would be fearful that when the 2 years are up, the bar will be moved again. This seems to be more about him and what he wants than it does about you and what's good for you and your child. I would not like that and I would have a hard time trusting that things were going to change for the better. Also, the time that is slipping by now that you could be spending with your child can never be regained. I would be jealous for them.

    Answer by NannyB. at 11:07 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • You do what it takes to take care of your family. It's not about what we want, it's about what's right. That said, I wouldn't be partnered with a man who wasn't fully committed to my family.

    Answer by justnancyb at 11:15 AM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • try to find a different job where you can still survive but not have to work so much...

    Answer by figaro8895 at 12:55 PM on Aug. 5, 2010

  • Ask yourself this you see a future with your so? Whatever decision you make, you should not have regrets about it...

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 1:20 PM on Aug. 5, 2010

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