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How do people strictly breastfeed, work, and go to school and stay normal?

I have my son at work with me (working for my parents, because they needed help for a week, and well i have been here 2 months lol). Which I don't mind helping out, but I am also going to class twice a week for my masters, and I am about to go CRAZY! He will not take a bottle so I can have any time to myself, he is 7 months old, and I love spending time with him, and I am glad he still wants to nurse, but I need a break from life! What should I do?

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Asked by sweetbeb05 at 10:43 AM on Aug. 6, 2010 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 5 (64 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • Honestly. I would keep doing exactly what you are doing. Stressful or not. I would help the parents, nurse my son, and continue school. In the end, when school is done, you have a different job and your son is in will be glad you managed. Not that you wouldn't be glad if you didn't..but, you've done it for 2 months already..keep going.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 10:46 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • I think you need to get the boy to take a bottle, or you may really go crazy. :) We all need a break, nothing wrong with that. Pump some milk and walk away, he will eventually get used to the idea. I hope that didn't sound harsh, I have been there. Good luck!

    Answer by Jessica157 at 10:49 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • I didn't have the luxury of having my baby with me at work when I breastfed. My oldest hated the bottle at first, but she had no choice. My husband didn't have the equipment I had, and she quickly learned that if she didn't take the bottle she would be hungry. Her desire to eat won out over her dislike of the bottle. Giving a bottle doesn't mean not breastfeeding. Pump some breastmilk, put it in a bottle and have someone else feed him. Stay out of the room when others feed him and he'll decide that bottle isn't so bad. All moms need a break, even breastfeeding moms.

    Answer by anime_mom619 at 11:01 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • You are doing a good job. Can he drink from a sippy cup try while you are bizzy. If not keep trying the bottle he will eat if he is hungry.

    Answer by kristina1310 at 11:05 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • I have tried leaving him with my parents for 6 hours, he would rather starve than eat! But I have managed 7 months, with MANY breakdowns, lol. My husband doesn't get how stressful this is for me. He wont even help change a diaper if it has poop in it! And instead of arguing because he doesn't think I am working as "hard" as him, I just do it. Thats how exhausted I am, I wont even stand up for myself. Like the other day I was really just wanting to take a shower and sit there for a little whlie, and I was about to get in and I didn't know there was poop in the diaper otherwise I would have changed it before I got in, but he came in and said you need to change this first, or he is just going to have to sit in it till you get out.... AGHHH I was so upset, I yelled and told him to grow up, he is a father, not a babysitter, but still changed it and sat in the shower and just cried...

    Comment by sweetbeb05 (original poster) at 11:08 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • my friends that have kids, which are all older, give me a hard time about bf! Because I never do anything for myself and I haven't seen them, they get mad, and I tell them, if I am going to get a babysitter or something I am going to sleep because I am doing everything from working, school, cleaning the house and laundry, and cooking, which my husband sometimes helps with laundry and will make the sides for dinner, but still, I am ONLY ONE PERSON! Yes obviously I can do it all (haha) but I shouldn't have to! I love my son and would do anything for him, but at the same time, I feel guilty when I have days that I think of what it was like when I didn't have him... Thats terrible! No mother should think that!

    Comment by sweetbeb05 (original poster) at 11:11 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • I look at it this way, the baby stage is SO SHORT, you will miss it when it is gone. Babies are mommy velcro, that's how they are. That's they way they are designed. Itake a shower with my baby. I time moments to myself to coincide with baby distracton by daddy and an impromptu nap. I don't get it every day, and usually all I need is 15 minutes to recenter, sometimes I need longer. It was hardest between 4 and 7 months. It's easier now to find breathing room at 10 months. I carry my baby in a mei tai/kanga a lot so it helps. We cosleep to so I get more sleep even when night parenting. Your husband needs to suck it up. Have you tried asking for what you need? IE "I need you to take over the laundry" "cleaning the bathroom once a week?" We were never meant to raise babies alone. It takes a village is true! My dh helps a lot, thogh sometimes I need to remind him that we don't have a house elf!

    Answer by amileegirl at 11:45 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • You need to stop taking on so much. Your husband is a big boy. He needs to see exactly what you do. I admit that the other day I told my husband that I would appreciate aknowledment when he sees a clean toilet bowl! Partners who work outside the home forget that the house doesn't clean itself aand their bureaus aren't enchanted and clothes don't just reappear. It's a struggle. It's one of the reasons why I stopped cooking.

    Answer by amileegirl at 11:52 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • I found that once I accepted the full reality of my children (they're really not going to conveniently drop off the planet or stop needing me, just because there are other demands on my time and energy), I found that I didn't even want to get away from them 'for a break.'

    The few times I did 'get away', I found that the lead-up arrangements, instructions, the stress of getting ready to go (or have them go) or whatever it took to make it happen was dwarfed by the tremendous stress of coming back, re-establishing the connection with them, dealing with their stress of having had me gone, putting everything back in order, finding the routine again and getting back to 'normal'...

    It was smoother life and tremendously less stressful, overall, to not go in the first place.

    I de-stressed other ways: putting my feet up, lying on the living room floor (no matter what else 'needed' to be done), hired housekeeping help...ymmv

    Answer by LindaClement at 11:53 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • Your problem lies in your husband. You need to take care of you and baby. I would forgo the house stuff and when hubby asks why...tell him you are raising your son and if he wants more done, then, he needs to help out either with house duties or kid duties, one or the other. Because you are working and being a mom.

    Answer by BradenIsMySon at 11:55 AM on Aug. 6, 2010

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