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What to do? (Autism)

My husband and I took out three year old son to have his tesing update. He is moving out of the birth to three year old program to the public school system. The people there were so blunt that it was hard to listen past the opening... "you are not going to like what I have to say." Also, they commented on how he has made no improvements. That made me feel like his life from the age of two to three meant nothing. We had a lot of problems with the program coordinator we had, and had to change to another one. Our son qualifies for everything now and we were informed he has a significant delay and we should see a specialist. Which we have an appt for. Anyway, he has a lot of sensory stuff and attention stuff going on. He will be going to preschool (first time) this fall in the PM for 5 days a week and will receive all his services there(the AM class was full). We still have to attend an IEP meeting soon. I need help

Answer Question

Asked by CSJMommy3 at 6:02 PM on Aug. 6, 2010 in General Parenting

Level 8 (209 Credits)
Answers (13)
  • hugsDo you have to send him to that public school. Maybe you can request a variance and send him to a different school......


    Answer by sherribeare at 6:05 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • Make sure you speak up at the IEP and give em hell! You're your son's 1st advocate and they have to listen to you. I feel for you. been there.

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 6:08 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • First off you are not alone. Second my son has mild autism and is on regular school. Going into the third grade. My son is a year behind in reading and writing. He also has a lisp. Don't give up and keep working with him. The more that you work with him. The better off he will be. Don't get discouraged by what they said to you. Are you in any autism groups here on Cafemom? I'm in one and it kicks butt! I'll send you a link for the group. There are mama's in there that are going through or have went through what you are right now.

     I'm here if you need to talk. Just P.M. me


    Answer by elly25 at 6:09 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • My son also has sensory issues. No loud sounds and chewing. He used to wash his hands all the time too. He only eats certain foods.

     Go to the classes with him and be his voice. You can do it and so can he.


    Answer by elly25 at 6:11 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • I have been in the same boat! Speak up and make sure you are heard. If you have any specific questions, PM me and I'll be glad to try to help out. I have a 16 years old son with autism.


    Answer by Cindy18 at 6:12 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • Here is the group that I'm in.

    Answer by elly25 at 6:14 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • I've been dealing with IEPs for both of my kids for several years. Some went well, and some were awful. This past May, I had a pretty bad one where I completely disagreed with the teacher about my son's placement. I brought two other people from the school system who backed me and offered their input in writing the IEP. It was a million times easier to get what I needed for my son that way. Sometimes as a mom, you have to be forceful and stand your ground. If all else fails, you can go to mediation and get a third party evaluation. Don't stop until you're satisfied with your child's placement and services. Especially at this age, it's so important! We're the only voice they have and we have to do everything in our power to get them them the extra support they need. Good luck!

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 6:19 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • Thank you all for your encouragement and comments. We had the testing done with the birth to three year program. We had problems with them the whole time. The IEP will be done with the school system. I can't believe my little three year old will go from being with me to 5 days a week of school... that will be an adjustment for both of us. I just have no idea what is the proper amount of time for the services. How long in minutes/days? Its so confusing. I know some things about IEPs, but its so different when its your child. I also need more help here at home. I also have two other children (4 year old - she will have school 3 mornings a week and a 17 month old. Its not easy.
    Thanks again!!!!

    Comment by CSJMommy3 (original poster) at 7:12 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • At ages 3 and 4, my kids went to pre-k two and a half hours a day Monday through Thursday. That was both in Illinois and Nevada.

    Answer by JulieJacobKyle at 8:09 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

  • My ds is on the autism spectrum, 15 years ago there wasn't the awareness there is today. He was tested and diagnosed at 2 yr. 10 months. At the age of 3, he went to preschool with an IEP and rec'd services through the school. I also took him to private therapy (speech and OT) that my insurance covered. Yes, it's a lot of work and yes it's hard to juggle two more kids with that schedule (I only had one other child, 20 mos younger). Don't be discouraged, it's hard work, but worth it. My ds didn't talk or call me Mommy until he was over 4 years old. Let me tell you, he's 15 now and doing so well. Yes, he's autistic BUT he's made it through driver's ed, he enjoys school (even though he still has his IEP and hates his special ed classes), he makes high honor roll (with a modified curriculum), he mows lawns all summer for pay and is well adjusted. My advice to you is to stay on top of his IEP, love him for who he is & does.

    Answer by Sonnut at 9:59 PM on Aug. 6, 2010

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