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Scared:(

Okay so my bf is of to college he is going to Oklahoma this Monday. Well i'm scared that he might cheat on me after all it is college you know you need to experience stuff and i get that. He doesn't want to brake up because he said he waited too long to be with me(since 9th grade we graduated already this June, we got together after prom hehehehe). Well i read some very interesting comments on FB make the story short about that there is this page called smash or pass well i saw some comments on there it got me mad because of the things it said. I do kind of trust him but then again that thought of him cheating is like in the back of my head. I tried talking to him about it he reassures me he wont do anything. I dont know im confuse...

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noahsmommy-010

Asked by noahsmommy-010 at 11:03 AM on Aug. 7, 2010 in Relationships

Level 10 (458 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • ell i think if you dont feel right then ask for a break not to break up completly but a break atleast until he is done with college or until you feel ready to take him back. so you wont be stressing about this
    Alejandra10

    Answer by Alejandra10 at 11:08 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • You need to relax. You can't let the fear rule your life and you can't condemn him for something he hasn't done. You can't control the future. Take it one day at a time.

    Cindy18

    Answer by Cindy18 at 11:21 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • If you don't have trust, you don't have a relationship. It may be a good idea to "go on a break" while he is away at college, that way you can both explore other options.
    Scuba

    Answer by Scuba at 11:22 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • When my dh and I were dating (many years ago) he joined the Army. I was terrified he was going to find someone else. After all, it was a brand new life, people with different experiences and I was sure far more interesting than me. So I wrote him a letter, setting him free if you will. He tore it up and told me that he loved me and wanted to be with me. Not long after we were married and have been 18 years. You just have to trust him and you have to decide if this is what you want as well. 4 years is a long time to be apart, is this the type of relationship you want? If so, just go with it. Don't nag or hound him about cheating, trust that he loves you and is faithful unless he proves otherwise. Take this time to get an education or profession as well. Don't stagnate waiting on him (something I wish someone had told me) pursue your own interests, expand your horizons as well. GL
    Austinsmom35

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 11:24 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • @austinsmom35 thank you for that advice i already enrolled for community college for nursing:)
    noahsmommy-010

    Comment by noahsmommy-010 (original poster) at 11:34 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • If it was meant to be, then it will be. I agree temptation will be there, but it may nor may not even matter to him. He is him and college and all the assumptions of parties etc are there but that doesn't mean he will partake in them or hook up with anyone else. Many students are simply serious students hunkered down to earn their degrees.
    jamesonjustines

    Answer by jamesonjustines at 1:13 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • I would trust him until he gives me a reason not to.
    LiLJeni

    Answer by LiLJeni at 6:19 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • OMG... sorry, but that's my initial reaction. When I was in high school I dated a guy for a couple years that I loved very much, he got me a promise ring, and everyone including me thought we were going to get married. I would have married him... except he was totally insecure and jealous and called me interrogating me all the time when I went to college, saying all his friends' girlfriends went off to college and cheated on them and he was really worried about that. That was over 20 years ago and I have never in my life cheated on anyone I was in a committed relationship with. What ended our relationship was his insecurity - I just couldn't take it... He could cheat now if he wanted, he doesn't have to wait until college. If he can't handle himself just because there are new girls around and he has to be apart from you then he's not worth it anyway... you never know what life will bring.
    figaro8895

    Answer by figaro8895 at 11:47 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • Oh honey, you and your boyfriend are so young! Now is not the time to focus on life-long commitments. Now is the time to learn about the person your are becoming. Focus on school, and growing your mind. After college, the two of you can re-evaluate your relationship.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:02 AM on Aug. 8, 2010

  • Thanks you guys he is leaving today at 5 well i think im just going to wait it out i mean if he cheats i will eventually find out without a doubt..i mean i always find out, i just hope he doesnt because i really have deep feelings for him
    noahsmommy-010

    Comment by noahsmommy-010 (original poster) at 10:17 AM on Aug. 9, 2010

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