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2 Bumps

last name change

My dd is 7. She has asked to change her last name from her bfs to her sfs. Now does her bf have to sign off all rights to her and dh adopt her for this to happen? Or can we change it without all that? Now my dh is more then willing to adopt her but I doubt bf would sign off. And yes there is little to no involvement on bfs part although she does have a good relationship with his mom. Any advice welcome.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:21 AM on Aug. 7, 2010 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Answers (9)
  • The bf would have to give permission.
    QandA

    Answer by QandA at 11:24 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • Your BF would have to give up his rights and permission to do so, but if he does then he wont have to pay child support..
    Claudiomom

    Answer by Claudiomom at 11:27 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • This would be difficult in a post-911 world. It is much harder to change names. I went through name change issues with my son. I had legally change his name to my name and the government changed it back to his fathers. He had to wait until he was 21 to change it back. He never met his father.


    Since the courts are involved and the child has is seeing the bf's family, the court would probably order the bf to pay support and the child couldn't change her name. If he signed away rights then he is signing way his family's rights and the court wouldn't want to do that. The court also wants bfs paying support.

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 11:32 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • You can change her name at school, but her official name will remain the same. In class she will be called by the last name you tell them. Her father will have to sign off on the adoption.
    queen.bee

    Answer by queen.bee at 11:36 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • In the state I lived in if you allowed the sf to adopt her and you two got divorced he may actually have more rights to her than you do. He could get physical custody and you have visitation and pay support. With the high rate of divorce do you want to risk your rights to your child. The court may not allow her to be adopted for that reason. There may be a lot of costs involved.


    Unless the father has abandoned her and it has been a certain number of years since he has seen her and/or paid support then he would probably have to sign away his rights.


     

    Gailll

    Answer by Gailll at 11:38 AM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • My husband's step dad had to legally adopt him to change his last name, I imagine that is the way it still works?
    KTMOM

    Answer by KTMOM at 7:14 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • when I was a kid we just did it and no one questioned it. These days I can't even begin to guess. Talk to a lawyer. There are tons of free consultations in the phone book.
    Liansmommie

    Answer by Liansmommie at 5:34 AM on Aug. 8, 2010

  • My husband adopted my son when he was three. He had no relationship with his BF but, had regular visits his Gma on BFs side. Since your daughter is 7 she may be able to stand up for herself in a court proceeding for adoption. It will cost between 2-5k and will have to be done through an attorney. After adoption your husband will have the same rights as you do as far as custody and child support, he won't have any more rights than you do. Ask the BF if he will terminate rights, remind him that all obligations will go away including child support. He may agree.

    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 3:44 PM on Aug. 8, 2010

  • Since the courts are involved and the child has is seeing the bf's family, the court would probably order the bf to pay support and the child couldn't change her name. If he signed away rights then he is signing way his family's rights and the court wouldn't want to do that. The court also wants bfs paying support.


    You obviously know very little about step parent adoption. They don't care if he pays child support as long as she is not on welfare. The BFs family doesn't matter, it has nothing to do with them. There are no "family rights."

    matthewscandi

    Answer by matthewscandi at 3:46 PM on Aug. 8, 2010

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