Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

Help pls

Ok I'm not sure what my question is but I need to write this down because it worries me alot. Ok me and my baby's father broke up and now I am kind of seeing a friend of mine that I have known for yrs. I mean he has always been there for me no matter what. But 3 yrs ago he lost his son and I am not sure how he is going to act when my son is born. I mean he knows that I am pregnant and everything and he says that he will be able to deal with it but I worry that it is going to hurt him or make him feel bad about loosing his son or something I just dont know what to do. I mean I really care about this guy and just the thought of something I do hurting him makes me want to cry.

 
LiLJeni

Asked by LiLJeni at 7:00 PM on Aug. 7, 2010 in Relationships

Level 30 (44,491 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (9)
  • Your worried that your having a baby will hurt him? I think it gives him something to look forward to. So I think it is a blessing. He wants to be apart of your life and has been there for you how could this be a bad thing.
    RElax a little and go with the flow. The thing is that men are usually just what they are. They are not like women they are like what you see is what you get. So take it easy and keep on talking and being honest but don't build it up too big. Good luck.
    mmmegan38

    Answer by mmmegan38 at 7:04 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • If he is a good friend and close to you this may actually help him through some of his pain. I mean some of our best healings come when we are caring for others. If that makes since.
    Destiny10807

    Answer by Destiny10807 at 7:10 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • Thank you guys
    LiLJeni

    Comment by LiLJeni (original poster) at 7:17 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • This may help him get past it a little bit better. At first it may bring back some sadness, I'm sure it will. But it may also help him with some of it as well. But don't end things with him because of this, and don't treat him like a freak because of it either. Just be his girlfriend.
    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 8:30 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • Just take things one step at a time and time will tell...good luck!
    lizard111

    Answer by lizard111 at 8:53 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • I was reading something the other day, in the end the final thing said was," your where GOD wants you to be ". So maybe that's where GOD wants him to be in his life right now, if not, he'll know and move on. Good luck.
    MyAngel003

    Answer by MyAngel003 at 10:37 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • you didn't break him, you can't fix him. surely this person is able to separate the two children. his pain is his own and nothing and nobody will replace his son, however, this doesn't mean he isn't able to live life and celebrate the joy of new life. my husband's son was taken from him by the crazy baby mama and it devastated him (she cheated, married a military guy and moved out of country... showed up years later on her way to jail after all her kids were taken and he had no way to care for his son who was later adopted). i think he carries alot of this pain with him... we are expecting a son ourselves in a few months. don't think it hasn't crossed my mind how the two overlap in his mind, but i believe that he doesn't think about the new baby like that... he is excited although he does miss his son.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 PM on Aug. 7, 2010

  • Do you actually know that it's a boy? If it is a boy, maybe it can help him deal with the here and now. It may help him move on in his life. I do believe some things happen for a reason. Maybe it will help him heal, and go on with his life.
    amessageofhope

    Answer by amessageofhope at 1:46 AM on Aug. 8, 2010

  • Ya it is a boy
    LiLJeni

    Comment by LiLJeni (original poster) at 1:31 PM on Aug. 8, 2010

close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN